


Happy Ever After

by Cheezey



Series: Chronicles of a Dark Planet [6]
Category: Voltron: Lion Voltron
Genre: F/M, Humor, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-08-28
Updated: 2010-08-28
Packaged: 2017-10-11 07:22:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 27,186
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/109895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cheezey/pseuds/Cheezey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the midst of the dire political circumstances of Doom's court, Cossack gets railroaded into a rather sticky personal situation of his own.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part One

As he stepped out of the silver and black transport cruiser that had just landed in front of the estate's mountainside manor home, Cossack glanced down and smoothed out the few wrinkles in his fleet uniform that it had acquired during the ride. Normally he was not one to fuss over appearances, but he had dealt with enough of Doom's nobility being one of them himself that he knew what they generally wanted and expected, especially since King Zarkon had insisted he, as his fleet commander, make a show of speaking with each of the noble house high seats personally to invite them to the upcoming state meeting.

It had taken all morning and most of the afternoon to get through them all, and he was finally on the last stop of the nine on his list. He wished all of them had been as simple to invite as his parents, the high seats of his own house, had been. Unfortunately for Cossack it seemed that rather than accept gracefully and say they'd show up, at least half of the nobles would rather huff and complain to him about how inconvenient it was that they had to rearrange their busy schedules at the last moment for the king—not that they would have had the guts to say that to Zarkon's royal face, of course—and the other half just wanted to bore him to tears by showing off this or that in their estate, or asking him how his family was, and oh, wasn't he married yet?

That was a separate gripe of the fleet commander's, that the nobles seemed to have a hang-up about any member of their circle over the age of twenty-five, especially if in a prominent public position such as being a head honcho in the military, not being married off and producing little nobles to ultimately succeed them. Since Cossack had not only well surpassed twenty-five but was firmly into his third decade, the remarks came fast and furious, to the point where the commander actively dreaded attending any of the nobility functions. If they were not dropping hints or giving snooty little looks of disapproval that he was not permitted, under pain of lecture from the royalty and/or his mother, to tell them to go do something indecent to themselves for—they were busy trying to pawn off their daughters, sisters, or whatever other eligible ladies they could think of on him. Not that he had anything personal against the fine women he was set up with, but of the ones that did not compare in attractiveness to one of Haggar's robeast creations, inevitably they were either incredibly insipid, high on themselves, or did not appreciate his, as Cossack considered it, brilliant wit and vivid sense of humor. Additionally, he did not appreciate being nagged nor all the pomp and ceremony that went along with the whole marriage deal.

As he approached the manor that belonged to his family, Cossack briefly wondered if former commander Yurak, who had also been unmarried and a few years older than Cossack at the time of his unfortunate demise, had put up with similar nonsense. Not that Cossack particularly cared; he had never cared much for Yurak on a personal level due to his humorless and stern disapproval of Cossack back when he had served under him, but Cossack had the feeling, as he walked up to the grand doors of the deceased commander's familial home, that if he could ask him it would be a rare circumstance that both of them would have agreed on.

Cossack sighed as he hit the buzzer. At least this is the last stop. He had saved visiting the high seat of house Tonorm'oith, Lady Kuryaki, Yurak's mother, for last. He knew her only by reputation and vague memory, and he felt slightly on edge. He had just come from speaking with the high seats of former commander Mogor's house, and the reception toward him at house Garat'eth as the one who had been promoted to their dead son's job had been less than warm. Cossack did not understand what the big deal was, as he was not the one who had advised Mogor to make the brilliant decision to plunge headlong into the political mess that landed him on the fatal end of Lotor's blade, but if he had learned anything growing up in the first circle of Doom's nobility, it was that by and large, the nobles had enough issues to fill the Pit of Skulls. He had no reason to assume Lady Kuryaki would feel any different toward him than Lord Galdor or Lady Morgiele, especially since Yurak's end had been no less violent and sudden than Mogor's.

The doors pulled open and when Cossack saw no figure on eye level to greet him, he glanced down curiously. What stood before him was what could only be described as a walking metal teddy bear with fur. The creature stood as tall as Cossack's mid thigh, and was round and bulky, shaped like a rounded bear of sorts that walked upright. Though it was constructed of metal and had robotic eyes and a light for a mouth, fur grew in tufts on its joints. It looked up at him curiously, and its "mouth" blinked as a mechanical voice came from it. "May I help you?" it greeted him.

"Uh, yeah," the stunned Cossack said, before he remembered his manners long enough to stop gawking at the strange creature. He stood up straight and cleared his throat. "I am Fleet Commander Cossack the Terrible, sent here personally by his Royal Highness King Zarkon to deliver a personal invitation to Lady Kuryaki, High Seat of House Tonorm'oith."

"Please step inside," the creature bleeped back, and gestured for him to enter. Cossack followed it into the foyer. On the far side of the hall, beside a grand staircase that led to a second level, Cossack noticed an immense portrait of Commander Yurak. The painting depicted the deceased first son of house Tonorm'oith in full dress uniform, with his glowing light sword held at his side. His face was stern, just like Cossack always recalled it being, and his eyes, both the natural and cybernetic one, stared down at him in a humorless and warning glare.

After looking at the painting for a moment, its eyes seemingly staring harshly at him no matter where in the room he stood, Cossack shook his head. "Yeesh, he couldn't even crack a smile for that," he muttered under his breath as the creature led him down the hall and into a sitting room.

The servant creature gestured to a set of plush chairs and a serving cart that had glasses, tumblers, and a few bottles of liquor on it. "Please make yourself comfortable while I get the lady of the house," it told him, and then waddled out leaving Cossack alone.

While he waited, Cossack surveyed the drink cart. "Hmm, let's see what she's got in here." The first things he saw were a bottle of wine—one of his family's finest vintages, he noted—and a bottle of imported Tyrusian whiskey. That was premium liquor with a premium kick, and it seemed to Cossack like just what he needed after spending the better part of the day dealing with long-winded and stuffy nobility. He had no sooner poured himself a glass and taken a sip when he heard a voice behind him.

"A visit from King Zarkon's fleet commander? And to what do we owe this unexpected honor?"

Cossack whirled around and found him face to face with one of the nobility of the manor. She bore some resemblance to Yurak, although she did not have the canine-like ears that much of the Tonorm'oith clan, their departed first son included, sported and instead had the slender pointed blue ones found on many Doomites. She also had a light coat of azure fur upon her blue skin, although it was noticeably finer and more silken than that of the man in the painting, and it cascaded seamlessly into a mane of hair that ended just below her shoulders. Her face held the same pupilless golden eyes found in much of Doom's nobility, tastefully adorned with light makeup. She wore a high-necked, form-fitting sleeveless dress that hung all the way to the floor and accentuated a curvy feminine frame. Around her shoulders was an expensive looking shawl of a shimmering translucent material, and she wore very little in the way of jewelry, aside from a platinum choker around her neck that set off the hue of her scarf.

An appreciative, if not somewhat flirtatious look crossed Cossack's features when he saw the attractive noblewoman approach, and he straightened considerably as he regarded her. He remembered that Yurak had a sister, and additionally he recalled remarking years ago to one of his fleet buddies when he saw her briefly in passing that for having such an unattractive—at least in his opinion—son, Yurak's mother had not been too hard on the eyes either. Still, Cossack had no idea that his sister was such a looker as well.

"Hello," Cossack greeted the woman with his best imitation of a charming smile. "King Zarkon sent me here personally," he shifted his stance to a more impressive and dramatic one, "to invite Lady Kuryaki as high seat of house Tonorm'oith to an emergency summit meeting with the leaders of the first circle of nobility with him tomorrow."

"I see," the noble replied with a polite nod as she regarded him. "So you're Fleet Commander Cossack—first son of house Aldar'ach I believe, correct? We haven't met formally, have we?"

Cossack sipped at the whiskey and nodded to her. "Yes, I'm Commander Cossack the Terrible," he replied, introducing himself and emphasizing his official-unofficial title as he did so.

She took few steps toward him. "Ah yes, I've heard quite a bit about you."

"You have, huh?" he asked, trying his best to be nonchalant, but unable to hide the hint of the smile that tugged at his lips at having his terribly ruthless and glorious reputation recognized.

"Oh yes," she confirmed with another nod. "Just because this house doesn't have anyone in the military circles these days doesn't mean we don't keep up on things. It takes notable accomplishment to win a Distinguished Skull, and to get a promotion to such a position as yours."

Upon hearing that, Cossack's smile broke into a full-fledged and proud grin. Praise and recognition was always sweet, but praise and recognition from a pretty face, especially one related to a former superior that had always given him a hard time in the past, was even sweeter. "Yeah, well," he said smoothly, figuring that a bit of flattery and family ego-stroking back would not hurt, "I guess with your brother being in the fleet as long as he was and having earned a couple himself, you'd know all about it."

The noble blinked at the visiting commander. "My brother?"

The ol' Cossack charm never fails, Cossack thought smugly as the noble came to his side, seemingly impressed with him if the interested smile she favored him with was any indication. Swishing the ice cubes and whiskey around in his glass, he casually leaned his hand on the edge of the drink cart, supporting his weight on it in what he thought was a rather suave manner as he answered her. "Your brother Yur—"

"—Ack!" Cossack exclaimed, startled, as he leaned a tad too heavily on the wheeled drink cart. The tray spun out wildly to the side, causing the commander to lose his balance and fall flat on the floor in a loud and ungraceful crash. His flailing limbs managed to catch the handle on the side of the cart, causing it to topple and dump its contents over onto the floor. Fortunately most of the bottles were of thick enough material not to shatter on contact, but the open bottle of Tyrusian whiskey still poured out and soaked the rug, and at least two of the crystal glasses broke. As icing on the proverbial cake, the crystal tumbler of whiskey he'd had in his hands smashed to pieces on the floor beside him, spraying the shirt of his uniform with the liquor it once held.

Cossack looked up at the startled expression on the noble's face and his own awkward position, and groaned at his own klutziness. Unable to think of anything even remotely appropriate to say, he flashed her a sheepish look. "So, uh, that pretty much killed any chance of me impressing you, didn't it?" He sighed. "Sorry."

The noble laughed lightly and extended her hand to assist him up. "Don't worry about it, the Berbils can clean it up," she assured him as she helped hoist him to his feet. He smoothed the rumpled uniform out and shook a shard or two of glass out of his whiskey-stained cape while she surveyed his appearance. "They can clean your cape and shirt as well, if your schedule permits you to wait. I imagine you wouldn't want to go before King Zarkon like this, anyway, right?"

Cossack considered for a moment. "If you don't mind, sure." He supposed he ought to stick around and make small talk and apologize to Lady Kuryaki when she showed up anyhow, and he didn't mind talking to her daughter. Unlike the high seat's son, the woman he spoke with seemed like friendly enough company, and Cossack wondered briefly why his own mother never seemed to find prospects like that to set him up with. Then he realized the choker around her neck was probably a marriage adornment and she'd already been married off. Figures, he thought as she reached up to help him take off his cape.

The noble took the cape and shouted out a strange name, presumably one of the robotic bear-servants, and then turned toward him expectantly as he pulled off his shoulder armor so he could get his shirt off. "It shouldn't take too long," she assured him.

"He didn't say I had to be back by a certain time, just to report back when I finished," Cossack told her as he started to peel off his shirt.

As he struggled to get it over his helmet, he heard her chuckle. "You could just take the helmet off, you know, Commander," she pointed out, and helped him extricate it from where an edge had caught on one of the helmet's horns.

"With how things've been going, I might break something else and regret it." He noticed that she brushed against him pleasantly as she took hold of the soiled garment, and also that she found his remark at least amusing if her smile was any indication. Encouraged by that, he eyed her suggestively, and conveniently pretended he never noticed the choker on her neck. "So," he began in a flirtatious tone, "I never knew that Yurak had such a gorgeous sister. What's your name, anyway, and are you by any chance free tonight? I'm off duty, and I know this great place near Castle Doom..."

The noble laughed again, that time heartily, and turned toward him with her yellow eyes alit with amusement while she passed the dirtied cape and shirt to the servant that had just stepped into the room long enough to take them off her hands. After a quick instruction to the robotic bear, who obediently toddled off with them, she turned back to Cossack. "Commander Cossack, I'm Lady Kuryaki. My daughter lives with her husband, and isn't visiting I'm afraid."

Cossack's self-assured suave smile melted quickly into a wide-eyed look of shock when he realized that he had just hit on Yurak's mother, a woman who was easily twenty-something years his senior if not more, and the high seat of house Tonorm'oith—after breaking her liquor cart no less. Whoops.

"Um, uh, well..." Cossack stammered, his blue face flushing a shade of purple as he regarded her, "Lady Kuryaki, if I apologize and grovel well enough, I don't suppose there's any way I can convince you not to report this to King Zarkon? I think the whole point of him sending me out here to deliver the invite personally was so that the high seats of the houses wouldn't be insulted."

Kuryaki raised an eyebrow. "You're going to apologize for considering me attractive enough to come on to?"

Cossack frowned as he realized he had inadvertently dug himself in deeper. "No, no, that's not what I meant," he corrected hastily. "It's just that you're older—"

"Old enough to be your mother, you mean?" she said sharply with her eyes fixed on him.

He sighed again, unable to think of anything else even remotely witty to say that might bail him out of the hot water he had put himself into. Mentally he resigned himself to a forthcoming verbal lashing not only from her, but likely also from King Zarkon and anyone else she might relay the story to, probably his mother knowing his luck. It would not be the first such lecture Cossack had received about speaking before he thought and odds were that it would not be the last. "I'm sorry," he said finally in the hopes that the simple but direct approach would keep him from getting roasted too badly.

To Cossack's surprise, Kuryaki did not lay into him but smiled back at him faintly instead. "Don't be, at least not about that. It's rather flattering to have caught the eye of someone your age."

"So does this mean you're not mad about the mess?"

"I could have done without you breaking my crystal and soaking half a bottle of Tyrusian whiskey into my hand-woven Gloomite rug, but even if I am old enough to be your mother, you're a little big to put over my knee and spank, Commander," she responded wryly. "And I suspect someone with your 'terrible' reputation would probably enjoy it."

That time it was Cossack's turn to raise an eyebrow. If he had not known better, he would have sworn Yurak's mother just hit on _him_ that time, or at least cracked a joke, something her son had hardly ever done in the years he had known him. "If I may say so, Lady Kuryaki, you look pretty good for your age," Cossack said, his ego unable to resist the temptation to test if her intent was indeed flirtatious. If she was not concerned about an age difference, then he certainly was not. His only criteria for a good time were that the lady be reasonably attractive, willing, and fun. "I really did think you were Yurak's sister."

Kuryaki's smile widened. "I know. But fortunately for you, I wasn't. Sekavi's husband has a rather jealous streak and I doubt he would've appreciated you asking her to dinner." She beckoned for him to follow her. "Actually, I was quite young when I married, and not much older when I had my son. But the years have treated me well, and I suppose that's consolation enough considering what they've taken from me... first my husband twelve years ago in battle, and then my son the same way barely a decade later. Did you know either of them?"

Cossack nodded. "Yurak was the force captain of my unit back when I joined the fleet before he got promoted out." The commander left out that he had found Yurak to be a stern, humorless, and arrogant jerk, despite the skill and strategy his former superior had been commended for as an officer.

"He was a good soldier, the best of the best," Kuryaki said proudly. "But that Voltron nonsense..." Her voice trailed off in a sigh. "Well, I'm sure you don't need me to tell you that. You have his job now, after all."

"Voltron sucks," Cossack agreed.

Kuryaki smiled ruefully. "Crude way to phrase it, but I can't say I disagree." She headed through the arch toward the hallway with Cossack behind her. "Let me show you around while your clothes are cleaned, and you can tell me about this meeting King Zarkon called."

* * *

Late the following afternoon, Cossack was fast asleep on the couch in his quarters when a robot sentry showed up and told him that Haggar wanted to see him in her lab. Grumbling and groggy, Cossack made his way down to meet up with the witch. She glanced up from her scrying crystal when she heard the commander come in. "It's about time," she greeted him.

"The robot only showed up ten minutes ago, give me a break," Cossack retorted irritably. "So what do you want?"

"As you know, Zarkon called a meeting with the high seats of the nobility. He's filling them in on the situation with Prince Lotor's imprisonment, and of course, making the formal announcement about his marriage to Queen Merla." Her tone was not without a significant trace of bitterness.

Cossack also grimaced at the mention of Doom's new queen. Like Haggar, he was no fan of Merla's, although his reasons for loathing her were significantly different than the witch's. Haggar resented Merla's place as Zarkon's wife, while Cossack just had a general dislike of her for being an uppity bitch that needed to be knocked down several pegs. "I'm sure they'll be just as thrilled as we are that he married her," he said as he joined Haggar's side. "Is there any news about Prince Lotor?"

The hooded figure shook her head. "Other than Galaxy Garrison reasserting their decision to have him executed for war crimes, no. Princess Allura's plea to spare his life was rejected. Had it been on any other matter, I would have found some satisfaction in that Arusian fool's power being thwarted," she said with a sigh.

Although she was not the type to indulge in expressive displays of emotion, Cossack knew Haggar well enough to know that she was genuinely worried about Lotor. The prince was not as dear to her as his father, but she viewed Lotor as an extension of Zarkon and as the king's only son, she was loyal to him. Cossack echoed her sentiment, for he too was loyal to Doom's crown, and like her he was also concerned about the situation Lotor was in. The commander had trouble believing that someone like Lotor was destined to meet such an inglorious end as sentence and execution at enemy hands, but unfortunately the situation was out of their hands. Zarkon had given no orders to send in the fleet to free him by force and in fact had issued ones to the contrary, forbidding them to act against the Galaxy Alliance directly, supposedly due to some edict originating from the Drule Council. Whether all that meant that Zarkon was merely waiting until he had a better plan in place to free Lotor or that he had finally decided to wash his hands of the troublesome prince for good and let Galaxy Garrison do the dirty work for him remained to be seen.

"Maybe Zarkon is getting some input from the nobility on the whole deal," Cossack mused.

Haggar shrugged. "Perhaps. Time will tell. One thing that is in Prince Lotor's favor is that the Galaxy Alliance is a bureaucracy through and through. Even sentenced, it'll be weeks before any execution takes place, and that's assuming it all goes through with no appeal and on time. Anyway, the meeting should be almost over. King Zarkon told me that he wanted to speak with us right afterward, so I sent for you myself. If you're ready, we can head up."

"Sure," Cossack agreed with a nod, and followed the witch out. When they arrived, the throne room was still shut and two sentries were posted outside, indicating that whatever was going on inside was a private meeting and no disturbances were permitted unless it was an emergency.

Letting out a bored sigh, Cossack leaned back against one of the columns in the hall. "How much do you want to bet someone is making some stupid speech or asking questions that no one cares about that King Zarkon or one of the others will make an equally long speech answering?"

The witch cackled in amusement. "Your respect for the high seats of your nobility is underwhelming."

"I respect them well enough, I just wish they'd learn to get to the point," Cossack grumbled. "Some of them are so old and senile they forget what they're saying halfway through, only to start all over again. I know, because I had to see all the high seats yesterday to invite them to that stupid meeting, and Dasavar told me the same damn story about the statues in his ballroom three times."

Haggar's luminous yellow eyes fixed themselves intently on the complaining commander. "From what I've heard, you don't find them _all_ old and boring."

Instantly Cossack straightened and looked back over at the witch, feeling slightly defensive. Haggar could not possibly know about his run-in with Kuryaki, could she? "What do you mean by that?"

She grinned back cattily at Cossack, but before she could say anything the throne room doors opened and an entourage of nobles began to file out, chatting amongst themselves and separating the witch and the commander on opposite sides of the hallway as they passed. As he glanced over the crowd, Cossack spotted Lady Kuryaki in the middle of group. He eyed the passing noble as casually as he could, wondering if she had told anyone about what had happened the day before, and if so, what exactly she had said.

Just when he thought she would pass without acknowledgment, Kuryaki glanced over at Cossack and made brief but direct eye contact, accompanied with a mysterious smile, before she turned back to the noble she had been conversing with. Cossack smiled back at her, but shifted uneasily where he stood as he did so. He was still trying to guess at whether or not she had said anything when he felt a hard thump on his back. "Hello there, son," his father's familiar voice boomed from behind. Cossack turned and saw his parents, Lord Tadack and Lady Visycka of house Aldar'ach beside him, both sporting surprisingly happy looks.

"Hey," Cossack greeted them, somewhat puzzled and disconcerted by the expressions on his parents' faces considering what he knew the meeting was about, that it had run late, and that his father especially normally detested long meetings. "Uh, have a good time?" he asked nervously.

"You know how it is with state affairs, some good, some bad," his mother said with a shrug before smoothing a stray lock of her hair—the same color and wild consistency as her son's, only styled better—back into place. "But we couldn't be happier with a little private deal we worked out."

Cossack's father nodded in agreement with his wife. "I want you to stop by the manor tonight whenever you get off duty. We have some celebrating to do."

The commander looked back at his father blankly. "We do?" _Must be some sweet deal_, he mused as he watched his mother nod enthusiastically back at him. He did feel a measure of relief that they made no mention of his visit to house Tonorm'oith. Perhaps Kuryaki had not said anything after all...

"Oh yes," Visycka asserted with a triumphant grin, and out of habit straightened her son's helmet. "We'll see you tonight!"

With that, his parents caught up to the rest of the departing nobles, leaving the confused Cossack and the quietly observing Haggar in the hall. "What was that all about?" he wondered aloud, absently shifting his helmet from how his mother had moved it.

"The king will see the two of you now," a robot in the throne room doorway announced, interrupting the thought. Right away Cossack and Haggar gave the sentry a nod of acknowledgement and went inside to meet with Zarkon.

When the duo approached the foot of his throne, Zarkon smiled in greeting. "Glad you two could make it, and on time even," he said, and then glanced at the timepiece nearby. "Or maybe Dasavar just ran his mouth longer than I thought. Anyway, I'd like to talk to you about the meeting."

"Of course, sire," Haggar said with a bow.

Cossack also bowed respectfully before the king. "Lay it on us."

"Absolutely. Oh, but before we get started, let me be the first to congratulate you, Cossack."

The commander looked up at his liege in puzzlement. "Huh? On what, sire?"

"On what? On your engagement, of course!" Zarkon exclaimed. "I had no idea that my spontaneous marriage to Merla would put the love bug in the air."

"It put something in the air all right," Haggar muttered under her breath.

Cossack meanwhile was completely dumbstruck. "What?" he choked out. "But I'm—"

Zarkon settled back in his throne. "There's no need to be coy about it, it's certainly not a secret with how your mother was gushing about it before the formal proceedings got started. If I didn't know better I'd say she was happy to marry you off," he said with a laugh.

Haggar eyed Cossack curiously. "You didn't tell me things had gone _that_ far."

"That's because I don't know what you're talking about!" Cossack protested heatedly. An ominous feeling of unease settled over him that he had a sinking suspicion had something to do with the celebrating his parents mentioned. He fervently hoped his mother had just had a bit too much wine—though in his family, that was a tall order—and was talking out of the bottle rather than hatching up some scheme to marry him against his will. "I'm not engaged," he insisted. "I don't even have a girlfriend. Well, at least not one I'd marry," he amended quickly, his ego unwilling to allow it to be implied that being single was anything but his choice, "I mean, Cossack the Terrible can charm any woman he wants anytime!"

"Lady Kuryaki must have found you charming enough yesterday then," Zarkon pointed out with the amused gleam still in his eyes, "considering she and your mother apparently just finalized the deal over cocktails before the meeting." The king twirled his scepter in his hands. "I never thought of her as your type, but who knows, maybe she can whip some class into you, Cossack."

"That'd be beyond any mortal's capabilities I'm afraid," Haggar pointed out snidely. "Although I can just imagine the look on Yurak's face from beyond finding out that you'll be his stepfather. I'd almost be willing to see that fool again just for that."

Oblivious to the humor and insult in both their remarks, Cossack was still busy trying to wrap his brain around the concept. "But I just met her yesterday..."

"My, that is fast," Haggar remarked sarcastically.

"Anyway," Zarkon continued, "you have my sincerest congratulations, and I'm sure if Merla were here she'd give the same. Probably even Lotor, too, but after all, he's why we're having this meeting, so we should move onto the matter at hand."

Haggar nodded to the king. "As you wish, sire."

Grateful for the change of subject, Cossack too gave Zarkon a nod of acknowledgment. Suddenly devoting his mental energies toward a means to freeing Prince Lotor from his prison and death sentence by the Galaxy Alliance was a welcome distraction for the commander from trying to think up a way out of his own no-win situation.

* * *

Once the strategy session was over and he was dismissed, Cossack wasted no time in heading out to his family's estate. Located in the lusher warm lands of Doom's equator, the manor of the high seats and family of house Aldar'ach was the magnificent centerpiece of the largest and most profitable Doom grape plantation on the planet.

Not bothering to knock or even announce his arrival, Cossack barged into the family home, past slaves and servants that knew the first son and bowed in respect to him as he passed, and found his parents and the two youngest of his siblings—his eleven year old brother Tadran and his eighteen year old sister Cassri—in the dining room, seated at the table. As was customary for the house, several decanters of fine wine were set out on the table along with a selection of abundant and decadent finger foods.

When he came in he slammed his hands down on the table. "What are you doing to me?" he demanded, his golden eyes alit with outrage.

"Yeesh, you're in a huff," Cassri muttered sarcastically as she sipped at her wine goblet. A perfect blend of her parents in appearance, she had the same wild mane of hair that Cossack inherited from their mother, tamed into place through being tied into a ponytail with multiple bands, and the slim build of their father. Cossack's more muscular frame came from Visycka's side of the family, and he was one of only two of his siblings that had inherited it. It was quite an advantage for beating them up when necessary.

"Hi Cossack," Tadran, a short and lanky child with short gray hair and a smile even more impish than that of his eldest brother's, said with a snicker.

Cossack glared at his younger siblings only for a moment before he returned his disapproving look to their parents. Visycka sighed and motioned to an empty chair. "Sit down, dear, and calm down. Have some food and wine."

"I don't want food and wine, I want to find out what the hell you're railroading me into," Cossack ranted, but sat down anyway.

His little brother began humming the wedding march, while his sister giggled in mischievous delight. His parents ignored them both and regarded Cossack calmly, paying little attention to their eldest son's obvious outrage. "So, who told you?" Tadack asked.

"King Zarkon congratulated me on my upcoming marriage," Cossack said sulkily. "Imagine my surprise to find out about my engagement."

"Well, son, it is time that you settled down," his father replied with a shrug, and then took a savage bite out of his chicken leg.

"With Lady Kuryaki?" Cossack exclaimed dubiously, growing even more agitated as it became clear that there had been no mistake or joke, as he had tried to convince himself it had to be on the ride over, and that his parents were indeed serious.

Visycka smiled warmly at her son and laced her fingers together satisfactorily, causing her expensive bracelets, one of which was the ostentatious marriage adornment she had received from Tadack years ago, to clang together in front of her goblet. "She's a lovely and respectable lady. When you think about it, she's ideal for you, and you'll make a fine pair. I just wish you'd told me sooner that you preferred a more experienced woman as opposed to a young and naïve girl, Cossack. I'd have considered the widows of the nobility in finding a bride for you from the start."

"At least now we know for sure he's not gay," Cassri chimed in helpfully.

Cossack shot his younger sister a death glare. "If all women were like you, I'd consider it."

His sister's mature reply was to blow him a raspberry and drink more of her wine, while his mother motioned for one of the servants to bring him a drink. Cossack took the offered beverage and chugged most of it in one unceremonious gulp. "So when were you going to tell me that I was engaged?"

"Tonight of course," Tadack told him. "Why do you think we asked you to come out here on such short notice? We know how busy you are."

"He'll be busier soon making wedding plans," Tadran snickered to Cassri, who dissolved into mutual giggles with him.

That time the glare Cossack cast his siblings was accompanied with a warning snarl before he turned back to his parents. "Do I even get a say in this?"

Visycka arched an eyebrow at her objecting son. "Every other time we've given you a say, you say 'no'. What would you have said this time?"

"No!" Cossack bellowed back in frustration, as if the answer should have been obvious.

"Exactly," his mother declared with a triumphant smile. "I think you're just _trying_ to be difficult, Cossack, so we just skipped that tedious step this time. You know you have to get married sooner or later."

Cossack frowned. "I do?"

"We all do," Tadack informed him with a stern look. "It's our duty in keeping the noble lines strong. We've told you that."

"But this time you're not even giving me a choice about who I marry!"

Letting out a sigh, Visycka leaned forward against the table and met her son's gaze pointedly. "We've given you plenty of choices, Cossack, and you've turned them all down. Every single one in at least ten years now." She shook her finger for emphasis as she spoke. "So now we're taking the pressure of making the choice off of you. Besides, you obviously liked her yesterday if you hit on her."

"I was just thinking about dinner and getting her in bed," Cossack argued bluntly.

"Well, you gotta start somewhere," was Tadack's equally blunt response. "Might as well marry someone you want to sleep with in the first place, otherwise the nights'll be real long."

Cossack tightened his grip on the empty silver goblet in his hands and fought the urge to strangle that family loyalty prevented him from acting upon. "Don't both she and I have to agree to this wedding for it to happen?"

Tadack leaned back in his chair, and looked calmly at his son. "Lady Kuryaki's all in favor of this marriage. You both stand to gain quite a bit from it, you know. She and your mother had a nice talk about it before the state meeting. Kuryaki said she found you to be, and I quote 'a real charmer,'" he said, and grinned before adding, "of course, being our boy, how could you not be?" When he finished speaking, the Lord of house Aldar'ach folded his arms and put his feet up on the table, relaxing contentedly.

"You do like her, don't you?" Cossack's mother pressed.

Thoroughly enjoying his oldest brother's predicament, Tadran grinned. "Yeah, Cossack, you can't go saying that one looks like a robeast or uglier than Witch Haggar like you did the last one."

"That's because that last one _did_ look like a robeast, and she had claws and a personality to match," Cossack retorted to his youngest sibling before addressing his mother's argument. "And what if I said I didn't like her after all and only wanted to use her for physical pleasure?"

"I'd say it was a shame, since you're going to be marrying her soon regardless, and she probably won't find that attitude very charming. Thus, you'll be off to a rocky start," Visycka countered firmly.

"Not that there's anything wrong with starting things off a little heated," Tadack added, and reached over to squeeze his wife's shoulder. "Back when we got married, son, we couldn't stand each other. Remember that, honey?"

Visycka nodded and smiled pleasantly. "I think it was the sex, well that and plotting revenge against our parents, that brought us close like we are now. And while it was a bit of a rough adjustment," she said, her fleeting wince momentarily betraying the dramatic optimism in her tone, "see how well that worked out for us? Well over thirty years and still together, and both alive," she declared proudly.

"Yeah, but you've been drunk for the last thirty years too," Cossack muttered under his breath before trying another argument. "Besides, no matter what I think of Kuryaki herself, she's still Yurak's mother. Yurak! Dog-face! The guy who gave me and Yaklitz hell in fleet boot camp from day one."

Cassri frowned at her brother. "I thought that was Vardash."

"No, Vardash sucked, but it was Kuryaki's son that he sucked up to," Cossack corrected her. "I think he had a crush on him."

"Well, he was kinda cute," Cassri said with a shrug.

"Vardash?" Visycka turned to her daughter with a curious look. "You know he's not married..."

"Yeah, 'cause he's as gay as they come!" Cassri exclaimed, making a face that indicated sheer horror at the very thought of being foisted into such a union. "Besides, I meant Commander Yurak. Well, before he died anyway."

Visycka waved her hand in reassurance at her youngest daughter. "Relax, dear, it was just a thought."

"Yeah, right, I've heard that one too and look where I am," Cossack sneered with a heavy dose of bitterness evident in his tone. The conversation was briefly cut off when two servants came in and put a tray of desserts out on the table for the family, but resumed after they exited the room once more. Cossack helped himself to a chocolaty pastry, which he dipped in his refilled wine glass before taking a ferocious bite, to console his sour mood before proceeding with a new tactic. "Mom, the incredible awkwardness of me marrying the mother of a former superior officer aside, doesn't it bother you to see your firstborn son marry a woman older than you?"

Picking up a spoon, Visycka stirred some cream into her spiked after-dinner coffee. "Actually, dear, Kuryaki is a few years younger than I, even though her son was older than you. Sevakor married her right when she came of age. Unlike you, he liked the young virginal types." She sipped at her drink, and looked over at her son imploringly. "Cossack, dear, cheer up. This is a wonderful opportunity for you, and for our entire family. Don't you know what a tie to Tonorm'oith's interplanetary contracts could do for our marketing? Not to mention when you marry, you'll be a high seat of that house alongside her!"

"Yeah, you don't even have to wait until we croak to reap the benefits," Tadack pointed out with a grin on his moustached blue face that Cossack found downright evil in its smugness.

Visycka nodded along with him. "And think of the prestige."

"Uh-huh," Cossack nodded with them in tandem, unconvinced. "Think of the prestige for my two parents, marrying off one kid to be a high seat of another noble house and passing on a title to another after they're gone. Because how many high seats can claim that they have two blood offspring that'll be high seats without either having their kids bumping each other off after they're gone or by breaking the three generation rule and marrying them to each other? Never mind that they're selling their firstborn off to the highest bidder!" he finished with a melodramatic shout.

"Sell you off? Boy, the way you've carried on it's damn near impossible to give you away," Tadack shouted back. "So consider yourself lucky you got yourself a hot one, take the offer, and run with it."

"Don't forget," Visycka pointed out, "you'll also have voting power as a high seat, the chance to influence state affairs outside the sphere of the military. Surely you can see the benefit in _that_?"

"Just what I've always wanted; the chance to attend long meetings where you have to wear fruity clothes and sit around listening to boring people chat politics," Cossack groused, his tone getting whiny in its desperation.

At that Tadack laughed. "Right son, and next you're going to try and tell us that as fleet commander, you don't have to sit through boring meetings already on the military front? I've _met_ with the high admirals on occasion. I know how long-winded they can be."

Cossack frowned at his father. "Yeah, but at those meetings at least I'm paid to be bored and I can wear my uniform, not a suit or one of those gods-forsaken frilly collars. Which," he glanced severely at his mother, "I am most certainly _not_ wearing at any wedding I may have in the future."

"Oh, so you do agree to the marriage then," Visycka said, brightening into a beaming smile. "Wonderful!"

"No I don't!" Cossack bellowed, getting to his feet and slamming his hands down on the table in complete and utter frustration. "I'm not getting married!"

"Of course you are." His mother's tone was completely dismissive, as if she had not even noticed her son's tantrum. "I'm sure the two of you will be quite happy together. You really should go and visit her soon, so you can get to know one another better."

Both of Cossack's siblings immediately dissolved into unashamed hilarity at the simultaneously irate and dumbstruck look on their oldest brother's face. When he turned to glare at them, Tadran could not help but laugh harder and hummed the wedding march again, that time louder and more obnoxiously.

Furious, Cossack whirled around and took two large strides to his little brother's seat, and hoisted him out of the plush dining room chair he sat in by his neck. "Laugh it up, flower boy," Cossack sneered viciously, his yellow eyes glaring directly into those of his little brother's. "You'll be in for this in a few years. Oh, and I assure you, if I am forced to marry Kuryaki, you'll be wearing the laciest, girliest, frilliest collar I can find, since I don't have a sister young enough to be a flower girl, and she sure as hell doesn't." He paused for a moment and then added, "Or maybe I'll just make you wear a dress."

Tadran quickly lost his sense of humor for the situation once in his older brother's death grip, and flailed helplessly. "I don't wanna wear a dress or a collar!"

"I don't wanna get married, but it seems we all have to do things we don't want to in this family, so you might as well get used to it early," Cossack countered, still holding his brother effortlessly high in the air while he squirmed ineffectively in his grasp.

Visycka let out a heavy sigh. "Cossack, put your brother down."

Cossack looked from his mother to Tadran. "You're a little pain in the ass, and none of us ever liked you."

"That's not what I meant," Cossack's mother's voice was stern. "Let him go."

"Of course." Eyes gleaming with vindictive mischief, Cossack immediately started for the door, intent on letting him go all right—right off the second story balcony.

"Lower him slowly to the floor and gently release him, Cossack. Do not make me ask you again." That time Visycka's tone was very harsh and no-nonsense, and it was one that everyone in Cossack's family, including the "Terrible" commander himself, knew not to challenge.

"Fine, Mom," he grumbled irritably, but did as he was told. Instead of proceeding, Cossack turned and dropped Tadran down in his chair—not quite as gently as his mother demanded, but not roughly enough to get a reprimand—and the boy slouched sullenly in the seat while Cassri poorly stifled a giggle next to him. Narrowing his eyes, Cossack addressed her next. "Keep laughing, you aren't that far off either. Don't think for a minute that Mom hasn't made a mental note that while Vardash is a no-go, you found Yurak's dog face attractive. She's probably planning to set you up with his cousin or something right now."

Visycka set her empty cup down on the table. "Oh don't be silly, Cossack. If my memory serves correctly, most of his cousins are already married."

"Besides, son, this isn't about your sister's wedding, it's about yours," Tadack told Cossack, who continued to feel sorry for himself and slumped over in defeat against the table, helmet connecting forcefully enough that the resounding clang rattled the crystal and silverware. "Like I told you before, we all have to get married sometime."

"What if I_ was_ gay?" Cossack whined from his prone position on the table.

Cassri blinked in surprise. "You mean you are?"

"Hah! You owe me five bucks after all," Tadran said triumphantly to his older sister, brightening considerably.

At that Cossack looked up and over at his siblings in utter disbelief. "You had a bet going on my sexual orientation?"

Cassri twirled her empty goblet in her fingers. "Well… we were all trying to figure out the real reason why you didn't want to get married."

"All?" Cossack repeated incredulously. "Who else was in on it?"

"All of us. Well not Mom and Dad, but me and Tadran, and Stryck, Sulestri and Zalik were in on it too," Cossack's sister explained, referring to the other two siblings of the family, older than herself and Tadran but younger than Cossack who were not present, and to his brother-in-law. "I bet that you were straight and were just chicken shit when it came to marriage, but Tadran was sure you were gay. Stryck did too, but since Tadran already had that covered, he laid his money on that you were bi and just afraid to commit."

"And Sulestri and Zalik?"

Cassri made a face. "Well, uh… they kinda thought you were, um, secretly involved with someone in Castle Doom who would get really jealous and that you were afraid to make mad."

The look of disbelieving shock changed to one of irritation. "Who?"

"Witch Haggar," his sister mumbled with a giggle. When utter horror and outrage flashed across Cossack's features at the mere notion, Cassri held up her hands in protest. "Hey! I didn't think it! If it makes you feel better, she owes us money since it's not true."

"And I just thought you were gay!" Tadran pointed out, and preemptively leapt out of his chair to duck behind his sister's. "Are you?" he added, peeking his head from around the back.

Tadack shook his head at the exchange between his offspring before returning his attention to Cossack. "Well, son, if you were gay, it wouldn't change anything. You'd still have to get married and have an heir or two. I'd just advise you to find yourself a nice pool boy to keep you entertained in the meantime."

"Well I'm not gay anyway, but it was worth a try," Cossack muttered with a defeated sigh.

Visycka smiled at her eldest son. "I know, dear, and I'm glad. It'll make your marriage so much smoother if you don't have to sleep around to stay happy."

The burden of defeat continued to sink heavily upon him. "So basically, no matter what I say or do, you're going to insist that I marry her, huh?"

Tadack nodded. "Pretty much, yes."

Cossack realized that he was fighting a losing battle with the formidable enemy that was his unified parental forces, so he decided to opt for a strategic retreat and regroup. There was more than one front upon which he could fight that war, and his alternate plan had worked in the past when his parents were that gung-ho about a marriage arrangement. "Fine," he said finally, and rose to a standing position. "Since I'm supposed to marry her in a couple weeks, I guess I ought to go and have a talk with my fiancée."

Visycka smiled and walked over to join her son, and gave him an affectionate hug. "That's a wonderful idea, Cossack. Give our future daughter in law our warmest regards." She glanced at the wine rack in the corner of the room, and withdrew one of the finer bottles. "And bring this with you as a gift. Might as well woo her with all the charm such a prominent marriage deserves."

Obligingly Cossack hugged his mother, a cruel and scheming mother in his opinion but one he still cared for nonetheless, back. She smiled back at her son proudly and straightened his helmet. "My terrible terror is finally getting married," she sniffled happily. "Be sure to visit us again soon. And call! You never call your mother often enough."

"Mom, I'm the fleet commander of planet Doom; I'm a busy guy."

"Not too busy to call your mother more often."

"Okay, okay," Cossack agreed, and patted his mother gently on the back as she hugged him again.

Tadack waved from the corner. "Have fun, son, and don't do anything I wouldn't do," he added with a suggestive grin.

"See you later, Cossack," Cassri called out, also waving to him. He waved back to his family and then, with the wine in hand, started out the door.

Tadran grinned smugly at his oldest brother's departing form. "See ya at the wedding."


	2. Part Two

A short while after he left his parents' estate, Cossack arrived at the doorstep of Lady Kuryaki's manor. "I can't believe I'm here again," he muttered to himself as he rang the buzzer.

A moment later the door opened and once again Cossack found himself knees to face with one of Kuryaki's odd servants that she called Berbils. "Hi, I'm—"

"Fleet Commander Cossack the Terr-erble," it answered in its mechanical tone.

"Uh, yeah," Cossack replied, not sure whether his title had just been mocked, or if it was just the creature's odd accent mispronouncing it. He decided quickly it had to be the latter, though, since he was the feared and mighty Cossack the Terrible, and a mere servant creature such as that would not dare to mock someone like him.

The Berbil beckoned for him to enter. "Come inside and I will tell the lady you are here to see her."

With a nod of acknowledgement, Cossack watched the Berbil curiously as he followed it inside to the sitting room. As he passed by Yurak's portrait, he could have sworn that its glare was fixed more strongly on him before, and twice as harsh. _Boy does he look grouchy! You'd think that light sword was stuck up his ass instead of in his hands,_ Cossack thought, and glared back at the painting on principle before he returned his attention to the Berbil. "You knew I was coming? Did my family call?"

"We remember you from your previous visit," it informed him as it gestured for him to take a seat. As he strode past it, Cossack noticed that the drink cart was set up as if it had never been demolished so recently, and the rug showed no sign of any permanent stains from the Tyrusian whiskey. "Lady Kuryaki said you might be visiting again."

"Yeah," Cossack said as he settled into a chair, deliberately staying far away from the drink cart. "I bet she did."

"Ah, Cossack! I heard the bell and wondered if that might be you stopping by on a whim," Cossack heard Lady Kuryaki's voice come from the opposite end of the room. He looked over and saw the noblewoman standing in an archway that led to another spacious room beyond. She smiled as she approached, and he stood to greet her while the Berbil servant quietly left, leaving the two of them alone. "It's nice to see you again."

"We saw each other this morning," Cossack reminded her, recalling their brief encounter outside Zarkon's throne room.

"I know, but we had no time to chat, did we?" Kuryaki answered, and then noticed the bottle in her caller's hands. "And you brought something?"

Having already forgotten that he was holding it, Cossack blinked a moment, and then held out the wine his mother had given him to give to her. "Oh, yeah, this is for you. I came from my parents' house and—"

Kuryaki smiled. "You brought me some of their best, how thoughtful," she said, and accepted the gift with one hand while smoothing the other flirtatiously over his with the other. "Perhaps you aren't as rough around the edges as I thought."

Shifting where he stood, Cossack alternately enjoyed the flirtatious touch and reminded himself that he had to convince her not to marry him. With that in mind he stared at her straight on. "Uh, we gotta talk."

"Yes, we do," she agreed. "Come with me, Commander, and we'll continue this outside and perhaps have some of this later," she said, and set the wine bottle down on a table. "It's a lovely evening, and I didn't get a chance to show you the gardens yesterday."

"All right." Cossack followed Kuryaki through the archway, past another room, and out onto a spacious and lavishly landscaped patio. Gorgeous gardens of ornamental and exotic plants surrounded the stone walkways, laid out in the skull crest specific to the noble house from which she hailed. At the far end of the patio was a fenced-in garden in which Cossack saw a lit-up statue of Commander Yurak. That likeness of him, unlike the portrait in the hall, showed Yurak in a proud military salute, but its features were no less stern. In fact, Cossack could have sworn that even from that far distance, the statue glared at him as well. _Gods, didn't that guy ever smile?_

Kuryaki followed Cossack's gaze to the statue. "My son's tribute," she told him with a sad smile. "After I had the Berbils recover what—what was left of him—on planet Arus, I had him buried there. He had the customary military service at Castle Doom, of course, but his home here was where he always came to relax… on the rare occasions he did, anyway."

Cossack nodded. "I remember. I was there. I think the whole fleet was," he said as he recalled the funeral. At the time Cossack had recently made the rank of force captain. He remembered that Yurak had willingly chosen to undergo the transformation into a robeast as a way to save face and keep his prestigious position in the military, which Zarkon would have otherwise stripped him of for failing to Voltron had he not done so. Still, Zarkon had apparently held enough respect for Yurak after his death to allow his funeral to reflect that he was in his command position at his death, even though he was the robeast that was deployed, so it had been a big deal for the entire fleet to honor his memory.

Cossack glanced at Kuryaki with a slightly uncomfortable feeling. He could have sworn that the statue of Yurak glared harder at him with each passing minute. "Is it just me, or did they carve that statue so the eyes follow you?"

Obviously not affected by the statue the same way as he, the elder noble smiled at him. "I like to think that he watches over the place."

"Right," Cossack said with an uneasy smile, and he decided that whether he liked Kuryaki or not, he definitely did _not_ like the idea of that statue or the painting in the hall always staring at him like that if he _did_ wind up having to marry Kuryaki and live there. _All the more reason to convince her to call this whole thing off,_ he asserted to himself.

Leading them to a bench beside one of the gardens, Kuryaki sat down and gestured for Cossack to do the same. When he did, she turned toward him and took his hand, meeting his eyes with a purposeful look. "I have an idea of what you're planning to say, Cossack. Your mother told me that you might be," she paused as she searched for the right word, "difficult in regards to this arrangement."

"Look, it's nothing personal, Lady Kuryaki—"

She held up her hand. "Please, there's no need to be so formal, especially in light of our situation and yesterday's little incident. Unless you'd like me to call you 'Commander' instead of 'Cossack?'"

"No, it's fine, Kuryaki. You're not one of my men."

"If I'm marrying you I should hope not," she quipped wryly.

Despite himself, Cossack smiled. "Yeah, well, about that…"

"What about it?" she asked, fixing her gaze on him. "Do you have cold feet?"

"You could say that," Cossack replied. "I can't marry you, and you wouldn't really want to marry me anyway."

"Why not? Do you have a lover that objects?" she asked, and casually laid a hand upon his thigh.

"No," Cossack told her, grimacing as he remembered his sister Sulestri's bet with his other siblings. "Cossack the Terrible just isn't the type to settle down. Like I said before, it's nothing personal. I'm sure you're a great lady and lots of fun," he assured her, and even flashed her a subtle leer as he finished. "In fact, if you're up for carrying on a torrid and passionate affair with Doom's fleet commander, I'd be all for it and you'd just have to name when and where. But as for marriage, well, I'm just not the type for that whole deal."

With a chortle at Cossack's blunt honesty, Kuryaki raised an eyebrow and trailed her fingers along his leg in a mildly suggestive manner. "I see. And why is that? Don't tell me that Doom's _terrible_ fleet commander is afraid of a little ceremony?"

"Of course I'm not afraid!" he protested. "It's just that, well for one, I'm a very busy man." Cossack sat up straighter and tried not to let her flirtatious fingers distract him too much. He did decide, however, that if he could swing it, he would definitely pursue the affair idea if he could get the marriage deal to fall through on nice enough terms. "I mean, Kuryaki, I'm the fleet commander. You know all the responsibility with that job, and that I'd have to stay on in my quarters at Castle Doom whenever I was on duty. I'd hardly be home. You'd be lonely."

"Actually, Cossack, I'm a busy woman myself. Aside from keeping up with what's expected of the high seat of a house, I also frequently travel on business. Such is the demand of heavy involvement in interplanetary contracts," she explained smoothly. "Besides, both my husband and my son were military men. I'm quite used to the lifestyle."

"Yeah, about that?" he argued, deciding to push the depressing angle on her as a scare-off tactic. He figured odds were that a woman who already lost her first husband and son would not want to go through it all again. "What if you no sooner got used to having Cossack the Terrible around as your beloved husband and he just, bang, up and died in the line of duty and left you all alone?"

Kuryaki smiled wistfully and nodded in the general direction of Yurak's statue. "Oh I've been there and done that, my dear. I'd hate to see anything happen to you, but it's nothing I haven't dealt with before. Besides," she brightened a little, "there are advantages to being closely tied to Doom's fleet commander. By Cesteo, I don't think a telemarketer called my estate more than once to harass me about switching my satellite service plan while Yurak was alive."

"That's another thing," Cossack pointed out at what he assumed was a reference to her patron deity. Doom's primary religion centered around a general worship of a pantheon of nine gods, but at adulthood each chose one god or goddess to honor above the others as their primary. Cesteo, the god of marriage, trade, commerce, and other legal contracts was a logical choice for someone of her station and background to follow, but had little to do with his affairs and hinted to him that her religious preferences could make a great case for incompatibility, especially if she did not identify with his. A follower of Elichi, the god of sun, stars, and other natural forces, Cossack also had the touch of Haggar's dark magic spirits on his soul courtesy of a vitality talisman she had given him. He had no spiritual conflict with that, but some clerics of various gods did, not that he worried too much about what they had to say as they had not been there to save his hide when he was on the edge of death with quark-burn fever. However, it was quite possible that Kuryaki could hate the very idea, especially if she held the same grudges against Haggar and witchcraft that her son had. "We probably don't follow the same god. I bet we have nothing in common."

"Probably not," Kuryaki agreed. "Athgar, right?" she guessed, naming the war god, the deity of choice for most of Doom's soldiers. "My first husband and son were both devout Athgar followers. We got along fabulously."

Cossack shook his head. "Nah, I follow Elichi, and I get bonuses from those ancient guys Haggar follows, 'cause she says they like me and she gave me a talisman in their name once."

"I see. Following Elichi probably does help you avoid those nasty asteroid showers and black holes out in space as a fleet man. I'll have to stop by his temple and leave a sacrifice of thanks for giving me my new husband the next time I'm in Darhin-Kal."

Frowning as that was not the route he intended the conversation to take, he pulled out another excuse. "Don't give your thanks yet! I mean, I know you see a man like Cossack the Terrible and think, wow, what a great catch he is, but you don't live with me. If you don't believe me, ask my brothers and sisters. They'll tell you what a jerk I am. You'll probably want to reconsider and call it off now, before it's too late."

"Oh Cossack, all siblings think their brothers and sisters are jerks. I have two brothers and a sister I'd like to smack upside the head each time I see them, and don't even get me started on my brother-in-law Tonchelon. Even my own children never even got along when they lived together, but my daughter managed to marry quite happily."

"Yurak didn't."

"Only because he was just as difficult as you," Kuryaki pointed out. "On that I sympathize with your mother's pain. He refused to settle down, always said his career came first. There was even a rumor going around that he was gay."

Cossack thought back to his early days in fleet boot camp in Yurak's unit. "You mean he _was_? I mean, we all knew that Vardash was trying to get up Yurak's ass in more ways than one, but we weren't positive the feeling was mutual."

"I did say 'rumor,' Cossack," Kuryaki replied with an arched eyebrow. "As for Vardash, most of the nobility knows he's fruitier than an orchard, but even if they were comrades, I don't think my son had that sort of relationship with him." She shook her head to dismiss the subject. "Besides, what does that have to do with why you can't marry me?"

"Well, what if I was gay? You wouldn't want to marry me then, right?" Cossack prepared to come out of the closet with an acting performance of full dramatic fanfare if that could get him off the marriage hook.

Upon hearing that one, Kuryaki laughed heartily. "Do all gay men hit on women they visit on royal business?"

With a frown Cossack tapped his finger against the side of the bench. Kuryaki was proving to be tougher to crack than he expected, and he realized he might have to take the route of directly offending her, which regretfully meant that a steamy affair with her later would probably be out of the question. Still, he supposed he could sacrifice the prospect of some sex for the greater goal of avoiding the hassle and responsibility of a marriage. "I have terrible personal habits," he confessed, stepping into high gear for the offending offensive assault. "I'd drive you nuts in a week."

"But I thought you said you'd hardly be around, so what does that matter?"

"I mean when I'm here," Cossack corrected quickly. "I'll be so annoying you won't be able to stand me. I'm used to living alone, so I leave my stuff everywhere." He waved his hands wildly for emphasis.

She shrugged. "That's why we have servants, to clean up after us. Besides, you've already made a mess in my house once without benefit of marriage, or have you already forgotten yesterday?"

"I also drink a lot, and hang out in bars constantly," he added in the hopes that visions of hauling a drunken oaf that came home several hours too late into bed would be enough to put her off.

He had no such luck. "Everyone in your family drinks a lot, Cossack. That's hardly news. You're from the winery family, after all." Her tone indicated that she considered such a thing quite trivial. "And by all means, enjoy your time in the bars. We all need our recreational activities."

Mildly frustrated but still unwilling to give up, Cossack pressed on into full on jackass mode. "I'd cheat on you and make you jealous."

Her eyebrow shot up at that remark, and as a result Cossack's hopes also went up that he had struck a nerve, although her quiet reply puzzled him. "Oh, I don't think so."

"Why is that? I mean, if you can't help but be attracted to the," he preened, "handsome and mighty Cossack the Terrible, then you must know that throngs of women throw themselves at my feet."

"Well, be that as it may," she purred sweetly, stroking Cossack's ego as suggestively as her hand did his muscular torso, "you may want to know that my son taught me how to use a light blade nearly as well as he could, and bought me a military grade one for my fiftieth birthday." Kuryaki stopped her caress with a forceful squeeze on the side of his belly, fingers pointing subtly but distinctly toward a more tender part of his anatomy.

_She's fighting dirty_, Cossack thought, alternately frustrated and excited by the cat and mouse game. _Well, she won't outdo Cossack the Terrible!_ He began racking his brain for all sorts of things that would upset a prissy noble that would want to maintain a classy image. While Kuryaki had not given the impression of being terribly uptight, Cossack was still sure that if he tried, he could find _something_ to offend her and scare her off. Determined, he began to rattle off a list of annoying habits. "I leave the toilet seat up, I lounge around in my underwear when I'm off-duty, I hog the remote when I watch anything on the projection unit, and my table manners are atrocious."

Kuryaki proceeded to shoot each offensive habit down point by point in a calm and concise manner. "There are sensors on the toilet seats to automatically lower them, and you can parade around naked for all I care so long as guests aren't around. All of my projection units are state of the art and voice-activated, and as for your table manners, well, you can be trained."

Both exasperated and surprised that she countered his listing of offensive behaviors with such ease, Cossack stared back at her indignantly. "Trained?"

"I've raised two children, Cossack, and I know what works. Rewards and punishments." She leaned closer to him. "If you're a good boy and behave for me in company, I reward you nicely when we're alone." She caressed his cheek with suggestive flirtation. "If you're bad—"

"You spank me?" He had blurted the thought out, wide-eyed and clearly thinking straight from the gutter, before he even realized that he had vocalized it.

She straightened staunchly. "Not quite. If you're bad and you frustrate me," she looked at him dead on, "I'll be forced to frustrate you."

Cossack frowned when he realized what she meant. "That's not fair!"

She let out a light laugh. "Oh, but all's fair in love and war, dear, didn't they teach you that in boot camp?"

Cossack's expression hardened with renewed determination. If she wanted to play dirty, two could play at hitting below the belt. "Well in that case," he said, pulling out a line that in the past had never failed to offend previous arranged noble-born brides, "it's only fair of me to warn you—I have a raging libido, and I'm hung like a stallion." He finished the statement with a crude leer that shamelessly and overtly ogled her curves.

When Kuryaki's eyes went wide and her lips parted in an open-mouthed expression of shock at his vulgarity, Cossack was almost ready to declare victory and happily celebrate the securing of his bachelorhood once more. Unfortunately, the remark that came from her was the exact opposite of what he expected.

"Well then," she said after a long moment, "it sounds like you and I will have lots of fun when we saddle up."

Since he had never before made it past that line without getting slapped hard across the face, a drink dumped on his head, or thrown out, Cossack just stared at Kuryaki blankly, not sure of how to react. "I—uh—um," he mumbled dumbly. "You know, you're the first woman to still speak to me after using that line? At least the first to not use a lot of profanity."

Kuryaki relaxed comfortably against the seat back of the bench. "Cossack, your brashness doesn't bother me. I knew your reputation well enough when your mother proposed the idea to me, and I've known your father for years so I have an inkling of what I'm in for." She paused. "Besides, didn't you use that same line on Jaeli of house Aletai'omath some time ago? I remember her mother laying into Tadack at one of the state meetings blaming him for your lack of manners shortly after that engagement fell through."

"Oh." _Time to get a new line_, Cossack thought somewhat ruefully. He felt it was a shame, as he considered it one of his better ones.

"If it's managed to get you into such trouble, I hope at least that it's true," Kuryaki teased.

Cossack straightened into what he considered an imposing and sexy pose and grinned at her, both for the pleasure of showing off for a woman that clearly thought he was hot, and because he had one last trick up his sleeve that he had used once before with success. Additionally, because the recipient of that tactic had been an off-world noble, Cossack had reasonably high hopes that the ploy had not gotten back to Kuryaki. "Of course it's true," he boasted, "and like I said, if you're still up for an affair, you can find out all about it," he assured her. "But there's still one more reason I can't marry you."

"Only one?"

"A big one," Cossack told her with a dramatically serious expression. "You see, I made this promise to a friend… he's a very good friend of mine I've known for years, and someone I respect very highly. We made a pact back in the early days of the fleet to stay single, and agreed that we would never get married unless both of us jumped into it. And I'm afraid that he's a confirmed bachelor."

A curious frown crossed Kuryaki's features as Cossack explained his situation. "You're honor bound by your word to a dear friend?" Cossack nodded back to her an assured yes laced with a smile that appeared regretful but was indeed one of celebration as he began to hope that his last ditch effort would work at dissuading her from viewing him as marriageable material. "That's very touching, Cossack. I had no idea that you were so sentimental."

"Don't tell anyone; it'll take away from the whole ruthless 'Cossack the Terrible, bloodthirsty conqueror and all around bad-ass' image."

"What's your friend's name? Is he anyone I know?"

"You can't talk to him," Cossack blurted out as he realized that she was attempting to outmaneuver him again.

Kuryaki eyed him curiously. "Oh? Why not?"

The commander shifted slightly in his seat. "He's a very busy guy. He's an admiral."

"Oh, an admiral." The lightest hint of amusement sparkled in her eyes for a moment, although it was brief enough that Cossack missed it, mostly because he was busy taking her quiet tone as a sign of her surrender. Suddenly she stood and looked down at him. "Well then, I guess there's nothing more to say. Come with me please, Cossack."

Assuming that she was about to show him the door, Cossack stood and joined her, ready to lay on the sap about how sorry he was to let her down about the whole engagement thing, but also ready to pour on the charm and offer to make it up to her over a late dinner and perhaps more afterward. She took his arm and led him back into the mansion, but to his surprise they did not head to the front door where he assumed he was being given the boot, but up the stairs. "Where are we going?" he asked. Kuryaki smiled back at him and opened a door to a lavish bathroom. She gestured for him to enter.

"Well, I went before I came, but thanks anyway, at least now I know where it is," the puzzled fleet commander replied.

With a quiet chortle to herself, Kuryaki went over to one of the artfully decorated mirror cabinets and retrieved something from it. "I'd like you to meet someone, Cossack. I call her 'Quackette.'" She held out her blue hands to reveal an adorable purple rubber duck with a pink lipstick-tipped yellow beak, wide green feminine eyes, and a pink bow with white polka dots atop its head. "Does Admiral Quackers approve of his companion?"

Dumbfounded, Cossack's jaw went slack as he eyed the female rubber duck, and as his intended used the name of his secret friend and good-luck-charm bath toy, Admiral Quackers—someone that very few individuals aside from his family, personal slaves, Haggar, and his longtime fleet buddy Yaklitz knew about. When he collected his composure, Cossack stared at Kuryaki dead on, unable to perpetuate an act anymore now that his final trick—one that had scared off the most persistent of arranged brides—had been foiled. "Mom squealed on me about the duck, huh?"

"Like a stuck pig," Kuryaki admitted.

Cossack sighed and folded his arms across his chest. "Damn. You know, you should get a prize for getting this far. You not only outlasted my offensive, but all of my backup attacks as well. With perseverance like that, you should be in the fleet."

"Fleet uniforms are far too drab on my figure," she quipped, and set Quackette down on the counter. Resuming a more serious tone, she leaned closer to Cossack and took his arm to lead him back out into the hall. "So tell me, now that we have all of these games out of the way, why are you so resistant to the idea of a marriage? You must know that this arrangement is highly beneficial to us both. It would be to our advantage to go through with it and make it work."

"I told you, I don't think I'm cut out for it," Cossack said bluntly as they made their way back down the stairs and to a sitting room, where they settled onto a plush couch. "You may be into the whole nobility schmoozing scene, but I don't like having to dress up in uncomfortable, ugly, frilly clothes and having to stand around for boring speeches in a long ceremony with a bunch of nobles who are just going to bore the piss out of me before and afterward talking about politics and business I have nothing to do with."

He began to pace as he got into the heat of his rant, not yelling, but not exactly holding back either. "Then once the whole deal is sealed, I'll have to move half my stuff from Castle Doom here, get used to having to fly in to report for duty instead of sleeping late and walking down the hall unless it's active duty in which case I gotta be there anyway living out of a suitcase—unless I want to live _here_ out of a suitcase. Plus, you and I'll both be the high seats of your house, which you might be used to, but to me means more meetings to force myself to stay awake through where I'm expected to dress in fancy clothes and those ugly-ass collars, and then, to top it all off, you know the lectures and nagging _still_ won't stop once we get hitched."

He shook his head dramatically to emphasize the point. "Oh no, instead of hearing 'so, are you married yet?' it'll be, 'so, when are you having kids?' and I gotta tell you, I don't want to change any diapers or deal with any brats. There are enough whining babies in my troops, and I don't want to deal with that at home." Finally finished, he exhaled heavily and awaited her reaction.

Kuryaki listened quietly throughout his heated explanation and remained silent for a moment after he was finished to be sure he was done before responding, and to take it all in. "Well, that's a little more workable than a pledge to a bath toy," she said, and offered Cossack an understanding smile. "But hear me out. First of all, as far as children are concerned, yes, believe me, I know all about the nagging. Don't think that just because I had a couple that I didn't hear it. I never got it early on because I married young and wound up pregnant seemingly five minutes after I got married, but I heard plenty from the time Sekavi was three and older. Only having two is almost as bad as having one or less, because then you're only replacing yourself in the nobility—not _expanding_ it, as Nadlax so graciously pointed out to me once." She frowned for a moment before continuing. "But then again, he's nosy and obviously can't keep his pants on if he has seventeen kids, so let's consider the source."

"That guy's a pain in the ass," Cossack agreed. "Did you know he tried to pawn three of his daughters off on me at various points?"

"I believe it. In the years since I lost my husband, I've probably heard almost as many well-meaning hints about re-marriage as you have for doing it the first time. At various points, Nadlax has graciously offered me two of his sons, and once he even had the audacity to suggest that since I didn't seem interested in remarrying quickly and only had two children from my first marriage, that the real issue must have been that men weren't my preference, and to 'help me out' offered me his sixth daughter as a concubine if I'd marry his fourth son." She shook her head in disbelief.

Cossack's eyes went wide in shock. "No kidding! He did that to you too?" When Kuryaki gave him a quizzical look, Cossack nodded and let out a bitter laugh. "He pulled the same stunt on me in reverse. When I shot him down marrying his third daughter, he asked me why, and when I told him I just wasn't interested in marrying any woman, he said I could have his eighth son as a bonus if I got hitched to the daughter he wanted to marry off."

Kuryaki's laughter mingled with his for a short while at that before they grew serious again. "Anyway, the rabbit house high seat's opinionated nosiness aside, keep in mind that as far as children go, that we have servants and I have experience with that sort of thing. It goes without saying that we'll be expected to have at least one or two as a blood tie if at all possible, which I understood going into the arrangement anyhow. But the Berbils will make it easy; they're excellent caretakers and nannies. Aside from your necessary role as father, which you made abundantly clear earlier would not be a problem given your insatiable urges, beyond conception the amount of time you wished to spend with any child would be up to you," she assured him before addressing his next point.

Cossack relaxed somewhat. "Well… all right, that sounds reasonable enough. I don't really hate kids unless I have to deal with bratty ones or wipe their butts," he conceded cautiously, and then raised a finger. "But I am serious about not wearing that frilly formal stuff. I hate it. My parents had to tranquilize me to get me into that suit and collar getup once I was big enough to fight back."

Kuryaki surveyed his attire. "You're comfortable in your fleet uniform, right?"

Instinctively straightening his cape as she eyed him up and down, Cossack nodded. "Yeah."

"All right then," she said with a smile. "Have your military dress uniform cleaned and shined and wear that to the wedding. I'm sure you'll look quite handsome, and being that you're Doom's fleet commander, who could argue it's anything but appropriate?"

Cossack's eyebrows shot up, mildly suspicious. "No frilly clown collar?"

"Not if you don't want to wear one," she assured him.

"What about at those meetings?"

Kuryaki shrugged. "If you can appear before King Zarkon in military uniform, nobility meetings shouldn't be any different. I'm used to the politics of being a high seat, so I can take care of most of the business if you'd rather. You would only have to show up at the meetings requiring both our presences or in the rare event I can't attend. As for the parties, well, they serve good cocktails at all of them for distraction, and we can find you something to wear I'm sure if your uniform is inappropriate, or at worst, it can be made worth your while to tolerate it a short while," she offered and leaned toward him. "As you can see, Cossack, I'm quite willing to make this pleasant for you."

He smiled flirtatiously at her, the ego boost of knowing that she was willing to go out of her way to accommodate him beginning to override his aversion to the idea. "So you want me that bad, huh?"

"I want the connections your family's business can give mine, and vice versa, and I want my status in this house firmly re-established." She looked away for a moment. "I don't know how much you know about the Tonorm'oith clan or their background, or mine, but I presume you know that I'm the high seat of this family because I married Sevakor back when he was the first son and heir to the high seating." When Cossack only nodded, she continued. "He and I were dignified the high seats by King Zarkon when his mother, the sole surviving high seat, passed on a little over a year after we were married. Since he was the first son, there was no challenge to that, as much as some of his family would have loved to try. As you know, Sevakor died twelve years ago, leaving me, the non-blood relation, to retain the title. The core family doesn't like that, but being that Sevakor and I had two children, dignified as first son and first daughter and both past adulthood, they had no challenge to it. If they demanded me removed, it would've gone to Yurak anyway." A bitter note crept into her voice. "But as you know, Yurak is now gone too. That leaves one blood heir to the Tonorm'oith clan from Sevakor's line, and she lives on Azuit. You can imagine how some of the more ambitious of the nobility view that position, both in the family and out."

Cossack nodded. "Nobility vultures, uglier than Queen Merla's bird."

"In all honesty, Cossack, as the head of the royal fleet and an attractive young man at that, I have no real complaints about you. Believe it or not, I find it more flattering that you'd rather carry on an affair with me and forget the idea of marriage altogether than I do other men your age who heap flattery on me hoping to get me to marry them so they can sink their greedy little hands into a title and the clout and status that comes with being a high seat."

"I already have a title, well, two, technically—my official one and my unofficial one. I don't really need yours," Cossack said with a measure of pride. To his surprise, he found himself actively considering going through with the marriage deal. So far Kuryaki had ironed out the most disagreeable aspects of the arrangement to his satisfaction, and with the stress of that considerably lightened, he supposed that if he had to get railroaded into an arranged marriage eventually, he could do worse than to marry someone like her. Kuryaki's age did not bother him. She was attractive and even at her age had a number of years ahead of her before she would even be considered old, for Doomites had relatively long life spans. The awkwardness of her being Yurak's mother was something Cossack supposed he could get used to and even in time come to view as point of amusement, if for no other reason than he knew Yurak would have absolutely hated the mere thought. Additionally, Kuryaki seemed pleasant to get along with, and unlike a number of the women his family had tried to set him up with in the past, he had no objection to the idea of spending time with her out of or in the bedroom. On the contrary, it occurred to him that the proverbial free milk in exchange for being forced to buy the cow would be a nice bonus indeed—especially if it was rich and creamy and served hot and steamy.

Kuryaki's gaze was intense upon Cossack as he finished speaking and she gave him a moment to sort his thoughts before she prodded him to say what was on his mind. "Cossack?"

"Kuryaki," he began hesitatingly, "if you're really serious about this…"

"I'm very serious."

"You'd still want to marry me just for those reasons, and despite everything I said and did earlier?" Cossack stared back at her as if he did not quite believe it, almost as if he thought there was some catch.

Kuryaki nodded to confirm that his impression was correct.

"And all that stuff you agreed to do before, you meant all that? You're not going to turn around say you never said that or anything like that? 'Cause if so, you're going to have one very pissed off fleet commander on your hands, and you don't want to make Cossack the Terrible mad," he warned, although his tone was more cautious than threatening.

She took his hand in hers and gave him a reassuring smile. "I'll give it to you in writing if you want, Cossack. Like I said, I want this to be amenable to the both of us."

His eyes heavy upon her as he weighed the pros and cons of the decision, Cossack stroked the silken fur of her azure hand with his thumb absently. "And it doesn't bother you to get hitched to a guy younger than your son, and one he didn't like at that?"

Pleased that Cossack was coming around, Kuryaki settled in close to him on the couch, and allowed him to drape the arm he had slung across the back of the couch around her shoulders. "My Yurak was very critical of all of his soldiers. My boy was a perfectionist. That was one of the reasons he did so well in the fleet. I'm sure his issues with you were nothing more than a personality conflict. I adored my son more than anything, but I can just imagine how he would have reacted to someone like you," she said with a smirk. "And you must have done something right, whether he would agree or not, or you wouldn't have been promoted to his job. As for your age," she murmured, her voice taking on a husky and flirtatious tone, "all that means to me is less time for you to have been badly trained, and that many more years of your prime stamina. Why would I complain about that?"

Flattered, Cossack squeezed Kuryaki's shoulder and forced himself to keep his mind out of the gutter long enough to settle one last issue. "What about the duck?" he asked with a raised eyebrow. "That's not just a scam to scare brides off, you know. Quackers is lucky to me. Are you okay with a grown man who confers with a plastic avian admiral?"

"I admit that's a peculiar quirk, but I suppose we all have our odd habits," Kuryaki replied. "The admiral is as welcome here as you are, and I'm sure Quackette will be delighted to share a cabinet with him. The Berbils will treat both with the utmost of care." She gave him an indulging smile. "Besides, if Quackers got you this far in life, there must be something to be said for him."

"In that case," Cossack decided with a satisfied smile, "I'm almost ready to agree to this whole deal and do it willingly."

"Almost?" Kuryaki repeated, eyeing him curiously and wondering what else he could possibly have to say. "You are a tough one to please, Commander. What else will it take?"

Cossack's smile broadened into an appreciative leer. "Not to be crude with a classy lady like you, Kuryaki, but I wouldn't take a new ship into battle without taking a test flight to see how it handles…"

"My," Kuryaki remarked dryly, doing her best to take that brazen come-on in stride, "subtlety is not your forte, is it?" Cossack opened his mouth to answer, but she placed a finger to his lips to hush him. "That's all right, Cossack, like I told you earlier and as I told your parents, I find your bluntness refreshing, if not a little over the top." She nuzzled against him flirtatiously. "And while I wouldn't have put it as bluntly, I agree completely. So," she purred, and moved her finger from his lips to his chest in a suggestive trace of its contours, "why don't you and I take that wine you brought over, head to the master suite and," she brushed her lips against his, "get to know one another a little better?"

Beyond the capacity to form a coherent sentence being on the receiving end of such an overt sexual advance, Cossack demonstrated his agreeability to the suggestion by answering her with a lusty and excited kiss.

* * *

Much later, Cossack wore a delighted and smug grin that spread from ear to ear as he lounged lazily on the king-size mattress beside the flushed, spent, and much to his ego's satisfaction, quite pleased—Kuryaki. His betrothed looked as if she could simply melt into the sheets, a sight which the commander always enjoyed after such a conquest. "Well that settles at least one rumor I heard about you," she murmured distractedly as she rolled over to face Cossack. "It couldn't have been an ex-girlfriend that gave you that unofficial title of yours. You are a far, far cry from terrible."

He frowned indignantly. "Who said that?"

"I forget. I heard it at one of the parties last year. It was probably the same fool that started the rumor about my son being gay."

"Nah, not Yakl—I mean, whoever it was probably wasn't the same guy."

Kuryaki raised an eyebrow with playful suspicion, but let it go regardless as she was still content to bask in the afterglow. "Right. Either way," she said with a smirk, "if it was up to me, I'd call you Cossack the Magnificent."

"Hmmm," Cossack replied as his grin broadened further and his ego soaked up the sweet praise of his prowess like a robeast did lazon, "Well, you can still call me that. Especially since I'm going to be your husband and you're giving me a title anyway."

"Oh," she said coyly, "so I met the Magnificent One's standards, did I? You're willing to, how did you so eloquently put it, take me into battle now?"

Fangs bared in the same smug grin, Cossack slid his hand along the inviting curve of her hip and replied, "With guns blazing and thrusters at max." He exhaled contentedly and settled into the covers. "I don't suppose you'd mind if I crashed here tonight? I'm on duty early tomorrow, but I just don't feel like flying back over to Castle Doom."

Agreeably Kuryaki drew the cover around both of them. "Certainly. I need to find out if you steal the sheets."

"Damn," Cossack muttered, and chuckled to himself.

"What?"

"That was another annoying habit I could have used," he said with a sigh. "Why do I always think of these things after the fact? Oh well," he said, and rolled over happily to settle into the covers beside his bride to be.

"It wouldn't have worked anyway," Kuryaki murmured back to him lazily. "I only wanted to know if I needed to order an extra set."

* * *

Bright and early the following morning, or as bright as it ever got on Doom anyhow, Cossack chugged down a glass of juice and a fresh-baked muffin brought to him by one of Kuryaki's Berbils, said a quick goodbye, and headed off for duty at Castle Doom dressed in a freshly cleaned uniform, also courtesy of the Berbils. He decided that he could definitely get used to the efficiency of those little robears, and was in a pretty good if not somewhat rushed mood as he headed down the stairs to the mansion's main door.

As he passed through the foyer quickly so he would not risk being late, Cossack heard a very low and distinct growl. The critical and angry snarl was one the fleet commander had not heard in years, but he had heard it enough in fleet boot camp that he recognized it instantly, and it made stop dead in his tracks. _Yurak?_ Immediately Cossack whirled around, half expecting to see someone behind him.

Of course, no one was there, but Cossack did find himself on eye level with the giant portrait of Yurak hanging on the wall several feet away. From that angle, Cossack could have sworn that the former commander's glare looked even more irate than it had when he'd first seen it, that his light sword was painted with a brighter glow, and his cybernetic sighting eye had a reddish tint to it that had not been present the day before.

_My head is screwing with me_, Cossack decided after a moment, feeling increasingly uncomfortable under the familiar scrutinizing stare of his departed former superior with each passing moment. _There's just more ugly detail up close. The artist was really good at his work, that's all, and I just subconsciously thought I heard him._

Realizing to his dismay that the mighty Cossack the Terrible had just allowed a painting to get to him, he straightened stubbornly and glared back at it for a moment. "You're just pissy because I'm going to be your stepfather," he muttered at it. He then mentally flipped the artwork off and subsequently forgot about it, hurried the rest of the way down the stairs and out past the doors that the Berbils held open for him, and hopped into his space cruiser.

When Cossack reached Castle Doom, making duty on time with two whole minutes to spare, the robot by his office told him that his orders were to report to Haggar. He found her in her lab, which he entered without knocking as usual. The witch stood by a bench that held a large, smoking, and bubbling flask. "What's going on?" he greeted her.

The shorter hooded figure turned and looked up at him when he approached. "Well, look at what Coba dragged in," she said with an amused cackle, and surveyed his crisply fresh uniform. "That's cleaner than I've seen it in weeks. Out to impress your new fiancée?"

"Nah, her Berbil-thingies cleaned it last night," Cossack replied with a shrug.

"Oh, last night," the witch repeated with a knowing grin. "So this engagement is for real? You haven't sent her off screaming for the hills yet?"

Cossack frowned, feeling somewhat defensive that someone like Haggar was mocking his personal life. "I'm not the one who hasn't had a date in a thousand years."

"Testy, testy," a sneering Haggar retorted. "I thought you told me once that you'd never get married. What's the matter, Cossack the Terrible couldn't say no to his mommy? Or is it he couldn't say no to Yurak's mommy?" She cackled again.

"Maybe I _like_ Kuryaki," Cossack huffed back at the old witch. "That reminds me, just how did you know about Kuryaki yesterday? Did she say something to you? I mean, before she and my mother told King Zarkon I was getting married before letting me know."

Haggar shook her head. "Relax, Cossack, she didn't tell anyone but your parents that you crashed her drink cart and then hit on her."

Cossack breathed a sigh of relief for a moment, and then narrowed his eyes suspiciously at Haggar. "Then how do _you_ know?" A wicked grin spread across the witch's shadowed features, and she gestured to her glowing scrying crystal, causing Cossack to gawk at her indignantly. "You spied on me in your crystal?"

"That thing's better than every projection unit in the galaxy," she replied, and let out another amused cackle.

"You need a life, Haggar, or at least to get out of here more often, if you don't have anything better to do than spy on me." Cossack folded his arms across his chest sulkily.

If the witch was insulted or even fazed by the commander's remark, she did not show it. Instead she just shrugged. "I was just wondering what was taking you so long to get back from inviting a few nobles to a meeting, and imagine my surprise to call forth a vision only to see you suavely covering yourself in Tyrusian whiskey and then stripping for the high seat of house Tonorm'oith." She cackled again. "If only that fool Yurak could see you now, chasing after his mother. He'd roll over in his grave if there was anything in it but robeast scrap metal."

Cossack straightened huffily. "He'd probably look like he did in that ugly painting Kuryaki had in her hall."

"Either way, I can't believe you're actually serious about this marriage," Haggar said with a wave as she went back to stirring her potion. "Do you have any idea how old she is?"

"Yeah, at least a few hundred years younger than you," Cossack snapped back at the witch. "Now stop picking on me, or I won't invite you to the wedding."

"Oh, fine," Haggar said with a labored sigh. "I wouldn't want to miss the chance to see you stumble down the aisle in one of those silly collars."

"I'm not wearing one," Cossack informed her smugly. "That was part of the deal we worked out last night. I'm getting married in my uniform. No clown suit for Cossack the Terrible."

The witch rolled her luminous yellow eyes at the commander. "Don't tell me you're even going to wear that helmet _then_? Do you ever take that thing off, horn-head?"

He straightened his helmet out of habit and stared back at her. "It's never wise to leave your head unprotected. You should know; you wear your cloak all the time."

"Yes, but unlike you I don't require it to keep what few brains I have securely in my head," the witch retorted.

"If all you're going to do is pick on me, Haggar, I'm going to leave," Cossack informed him sulkily. "Cossack the Terrible doesn't have to stand here and take this."

"Yes you do, because we have work to do," Haggar argued. "But since you're getting cranky about it all with your pre-wedding jitters, we can move on to that."

* * *

Once his work with Haggar was finished, Cossack headed over to his family's estate. He was still in a state of bemusement that he was actually going along with the whole wedding deal, and he knew his mother would undoubtedly be thrilled by that, but he still wanted to make some things to her clear, and find out exactly what he was in for as far as the details went. When he arrived at the plantation he found his mother in one of the spacious offices used for winery business. She had a media reader and a ledger open in front of her, and a goblet to her left. An additional decanter of wine was on a nearby table, presumably left there by the slave that had brought it.

"Cossack!" Visycka exclaimed, brightening as soon as she saw him come in. "What a nice surprise, to see my Terrible Terror twice in two days!" She pointed to a plush couch in the office for him to sit and immediately got up to join him. "Can I have the slaves bring you anything?" Cossack shook his head a no and she squeezed his hand affectionately. "So, how did it go last night? Did you two have a nice evening together? Get to know one another better?"

"Yeah, it was fine. She liked your wine." He smirked a little as he recalled enjoying it with Kuryaki in her bedroom the night before.

"Good! Actually I'm very glad you stopped by. Your father called over to her place this morning, and we tentatively scheduled a date for the big affair, so if you can just confirm with you that the date is good, we'll send out the invitations, get the wheels in motion, and get the party started."

_Boy, they don't waste any time_, Cossack thought as he gave his mother a response. "When?"

"Six days from now."

Upon hearing that, Cossack's eyes went wide in shock. "Six days?" he repeated incredulously. Although he had finally begun to accept the idea of being engaged, being married so soon after that was a bigger step than he anticipated, and he blanched somewhat. "Why the rush?"

With a laugh Visycka replied, "I'm just eager to see my baby boy married after waiting so long." That was the truth in part, although the part that the female half of Aldar'ach's high seating left out was that she feared if she dallied in the proceedings, her impossible-to-marry son might change his mind or otherwise alienate his bride. Time was of the essence, for once he was sworn into the deal and the king signed the certificate, there was no way for Cossack to back out. Divorce was a very rare thing amongst the nobility and it was rarely sanctioned without very good reason.

"But isn't it a little _too_ soon?" Cossack protested. "Won't everyone think I knocked her up or something?"

Visycka sniffled. "Oh Terror, don't get my hopes up that high just yet if it's not true, although if you two really got to know each other last night, maybe you did," she said slyly, and elbowed him. "And yes, it's a little rushed as far as scheduling goes, but the invitation deadline is four days, so we're still golden. We will need to get cracking with getting you a nice suit to wear though. I don't imagine the one in your old room here still fits with all that beef you put on in the fleet, especially the collar," she said, and poked at his side pointedly.

Cossack narrowed his eyes sternly. "I told you last night—I'm _not_ wearing a collar."

"You also said you weren't getting married," she replied dismissively as she debated whether or not one of Tadack's might fit him. "What's your point?"

"I'm serious, Mom," Cossack said, and drew himself up so that he loomed over his mother, his tone firm and accepting no argument. "I'm not wearing it. I hate those things. They look uglier than Haggar in the noonday sun of a desert planet and I won't be seen in one alive or dead."

Letting out a sigh at her eldest son's melodramatics, Visycka drank heavily from her goblet and eyed him with a no-nonsense look. "Cossack, you have to look tasteful. You're marrying the high seat of a house! This isn't some noble third removed from the main line of a family."

He refused to budge on that point and shook his head vehemently. "Look Mom, I'll marry Kuryaki with no problem, and let you finally write me off as paired up and hitched like you've wanted for the past ten years and not fight you on it, but I draw the line at looking stupid while I do it!"

"You look stupid when you do everything," Cassri's voice quipped from behind them. Both Cossack and Visycka turned toward the door and saw her standing there with a packet in her arms. She strode over to Visycka's desk and dumped it on top. "So what stupid thing has he done now?"

"Not kicking your ass so hard it even hurts to open your mouth when I saw you last night?" Cossack retorted.

Visycka gave her children a warning look. "Cassri, don't start with your brother. Cossack, don't threaten your sister."

"Anyway, as I was saying before I was rudely interrupted," he glared at his sister again, "Kuryaki told me last night that it was okay if I wore my fleet dress uniform to the wedding, so that's what I'm wearing."

Looking her brother over from head to toe, Cassri snickered, "Gods, you're even going to wear that helmet at your wedding?"

Cossack's yellow eyes narrowed. "Are you hanging around Haggar in your spare time?"

"Not as much as you, if Sulestri thought you and her were getting it on." Cassri leaned against the edge of the desk and sneered at him.

"I said that's enough," Visycka cut in, and cast a sharp glare at her daughter before returning her attention to Cossack. "Well, I suppose if Kuryaki has no problem with your fleet dress uniform, then it'll do," she conceded, "but it had better be flawlessly cleaned, and I mean not a spot or wrinkle out of place. And you are not under any circumstances wearing that helmet during the ceremony. It'll be hard enough for her to put a bracer or arm guard or whatever adornment she picks out for you on in that uniform as it is."

He nodded, not pleased with having to agree to leave his helmet off, but he supposed he could go that far if it meant no more hassling about the collar. "All right. Deal."

Noticing a catalog of wedding stuff on her mother's desk, Cassri picked it up and thumbed through it. "Speaking of which, did you pick out something for her yet, Cossack?"

"No," he said with a frown. "I just agreed to marry her last night; I haven't exactly sat around thinking about the details. I was on duty most of this morning."

"Probably playing Grenade-Hunter on your computer in your office," his sister snorted.

Straightening indignantly, Cossack informed her importantly, "That happens to be a strategic military planning program."

Cossack's sister did not seem to take his assessment of the program nearly as seriously, and sarcastically intoned back a response of, "Whatever."

Visycka refilled her wine and took the catalog from Cassri, turning to the pages that showcased marriage adornment jewelry for Doom brides. "You should think about what you'd like to give Kuryaki, Cossack. Remember that since she's a high seat, it's a piece that'll be noticed every time the house is represented, and it has to be something that can be slipped on during the ceremony with relative ease. Therefore it should not only be elegant, but also tasteful and meaningful."

Cassri smirked at her older brother knowingly. "In that case, Mom, you'd better pick it out. He'd probably get something like a thigh guard or a belly ring so he can reach up her dress."

"I would not," Cossack protested, annoyed by both the snide look on his sister's face and at the horrified one that flashed across his mother's features indicating that she feared he might actually consider it. Walking over to Visycka's side he glanced at the book and pointed at the first nice piece of jewelry he saw on it—a necklace that had an intricate chain and sizable precious stone pendant attached to it. "See, something like that would be fine." As he looked at the catalog, he smiled goofily at the thought of the pretty jewel glittering amidst soft cleavage that everyone could admire the appearance of and he could later fondle.

Both Visycka and Cassri sighed audibly at his selection. "I see what you mean, dear," Cossack's mother said with a shake of her head.

Genuinely clueless as to what he had said wrong, as he was fairly sure he'd kept that last thought to himself and not spoken it aloud, Cossack looked over at his sibling and mother. "What? What's wrong with it?"

"Did you forget she's been married before, dumbass?" Cassri pointed out tactlessly. "That choker she wears is the adornment from her first marriage. You know the rules. Once you're married, you don't take it off, even if the husband or wife dies. Your new one just gives you something to wear somewhere else. Replacing it is like broadcasting that they were insignificant to you and really classless and insulting… and she can't exactly wear two necklaces all the time, especially ones that clash in style. Duh."

Visycka nodded along with her daughter. "You really should have known that, Cossack. I know you haven't been married, but by the gods, you weren't raised by commoners."

"Yeah, why do you think Ardek of Ermov'diast always wears so much jewelry?" Cassri added. "He's been married six times!"

Cossack shrugged. "I don't know; I just thought he was into looking dainty or liked gold or something! I don't pay attention to what people wear; I'm not a chick! I also don't know or care who stuck what on who where at those weddings. It's hard enough to stay awake at those things to begin with."

Glancing from the catalog to Cossack, Visycka asked, "Well did you at least pay enough attention to tell me what sizes she wears or what metals she likes the look of? I think Kuryaki usually wears something sleeveless; maybe an arm guard would work for her."

"Sorry Mom, I didn't have time to measure her arms last night," Cossack replied sarcastically.

"Yeah, but I bet you could give her bra size," Cassri taunted, folding her arms and daring him to prove her wrong.

"Other than big enough, no," he retorted to his sister with a measure of defensiveness. "I didn't look for tags." He then turned to Visycka, visibly fed up and agitated with his sister's needling and his mother's nagging. "Tell you what, why don't you just pick something you approve of out there that you think she'll like, and send me the bill?"

"All right, there's no need to get testy about it." Visycka set down the catalog. "Shall I assume you want me to take care of everything else, too?"

"Yeah," he said with a nod. "It's bad enough I gotta get married, the least you can do is let me delegate as much of the bullshit as I can." He paused. "Although I do have one little request for the big day."

"What's that?" Visycka asked.

A twisted and mischievous smirk spread across Cossack's features. "Make sure Tadran wears a real spiffy collar."


	3. Part Three

The six days passed quickly for everyone involved in the wedding. While Kuryaki and Cossack's family were busy planning the big event, Cossack was called in on duty several times and that kept him distracted enough to keep from actively dreading the event. It seemed odd that all of a sudden Zarkon had him being sent out to this planet and that, usually on business tended to by high admirals as opposed to fleet commander, and if he'd had the foresight to think about it he might have suspected the truth—that Lady Visycka had requested a favor of the king, sweetened by several complementary cases of the family's finest vintages for the castle, that Cossack be kept busy enough to minimize any chance for him to sit around and think lest he change his mind and try to back out. King Zarkon had no problem granting Visycka's favor, although when she asked, Queen Merla had assured her that it was unlikely even if idle that her son would spend much time thinking.

Over those days no new news involving Prince Lotor came in, which was the only military situation important enough to potentially interrupt the fleet commander's wedding to the high seat of another house. Both Haggar and Cossack found it somewhat disconcerting that Zarkon still had taken no action and made no announcement as to his intentions for his son, but the matter was out of both of their hands and there was very little either could say or do about it. Cossack was otherwise occupied with assignments and his upcoming wedding and Haggar was distracted with dreams—dreams that she did not tell anyone about, but that irritated her immensely.

The dreams the old witch had were not dramatic or significant, at least in that they did not foretell impeding catastrophe or brilliant inspiration of any sort. They were, however, consuming given that they detracted from her rest because they were more than simple dreams. The strange experiences were visits from the grave—not of any ancient kings or sorcerers or anyone that might have been of use or interest to her—but from the deceased fleet commander Yurak. In life Yurak had not been one of Haggar's favorite individuals. Much like Cossack thought of him, she had found Yurak to be arrogant and condescending, and she had not mourned his loss when he was a robeast casualty in a battle against Voltron. Therefore seeing his astral form when she closed her eyes had been anything but a pleasant surprise.

The first time it happened she had dismissed it as a nightmare or a dinner that did not agree with her. He had approached her in the dream in a state of irate frustration, demanding that she listen to him and put a stop to something because he was being ignored. The old witch had woken up disgusted that her time asleep had been wasted in such a way but did not give it much thought beyond that, until it happened again. The next night, Yurak was clearer about what was bothering him. He sought her dreaming self out faster, and once he found Haggar, he complained at length to her about Cossack in his family's house. The deceased commander then demanded that she put a stop to the union of his mother and "that toad-pond born fool," because he would not stand for him "defiling" his house and his mother, as he had phrased it along with a stern growl.

Haggar's first and very sympathetic reaction was to laugh at him, but after Yurak did not leave and came back again the next night, each time complaining longer and more insistently about the matter, the old witch began to grow frustrated. Prior to going to sleep on the fourth night, she focused her mind to control her dreams to an extent, and when he showed up she told the dead first son of Tonorm'oith to go and stop the wedding himself if it meant that much to him. The spirit of Yurak had then admitted in obvious frustration—which must have been intense for him to willingly go to Haggar to begin with—that he had tried to speak to his mother but she could not hear him. Additionally he said that he had gone home to try and drive Cossack out, but he had ignored him. It was then that the old witch realized that Yurak was not even fully aware that he was dead. Unfortunately it was not until she was out of the hazy realm of dreams and back in reality that she pieced that together.

In the hopes of putting an end to the nightly visitations, on the fifth night of Cossack's engagement to Kuryaki, Haggar waited for Yurak to appear, and when he did, she did her best to explain that to him. Very succinctly she told her former associate that the situation was not his concern and that it rested with those in the living world where he did not belong. Then she added that he should really get an afterlife and move on to the astral world, and stay out of her dreams. To her chagrin, Yurak did not listen however, and instead argued and insisted that she take care of the matter, almost as if he simply would not hear that he was dead or accept it. Haggar then came to the conclusion that while his body might have died, his stubbornness was as immortal as the spirit and there was no getting through to him.

Hence when she woke up on the sixth morning—the day of Cossack's wedding to Kuryaki—Haggar was not in the best of moods. To anyone that inquired as to why, rather than explain the embarrassing situation, she only said she had been having disturbing dreams and not sleeping well. Most did not ask anything after that, for anything the old witch found disturbing by and large was likely not something anyone else wanted to know or hear about unless they were really stupid or morbidly curious. Therefore when Cossack stopped in shortly before the ceremony to see her, she was forced to use an excuse more on his level—a hangover.

"A hangover, huh? That sucks," was Cossack's sympathetic response. The fleet commander was already clad in his dress uniform, although he had not removed his helmet yet, and paced somewhat nervously.

Irritated, Haggar smoothed out the robe she had donned for the occasion of her pet buffoon's wedding, a garment brown like her usual garb but of a clearly higher quality and somewhat fancier than the one she normally wore as it had some gold woven into the edges. "What do you want, Cossack? You're supposed to be getting married shortly. Isn't your family standing guard on you to ensure that you don't run away?" she asked with heavy sarcasm.

Cossack smiled back at her triumphantly. "I had a robot bring a chocolate appetizer tray by to distract my two sisters and then while they were gone, another one called my brother's communicator to distract him so I could make a quick break for it."

The witch sighed heavily at the realization that her facetious remark had turned out to be reality, and she was not sure which was more pathetic—that Cossack's siblings were under orders to keep their oldest brother in place until the wedding started, or that he had actually escaped them with such a scheme. "You'd better not be here to beg me to stop your wedding or to try and involve me in some other hair-brained scheme because of last minute jitters."

"Of course not," the commander replied, his tone indicative that he found it mildly insulting that she would imply it. "I had to sneak out because my sisters and brother didn't believe the real reason I was coming here."

"Which is?"

Shifting somewhat sheepishly where he stood, Cossack pulled off his helmet. His sandy hair, normally unruly when the helmet was removed, was damp and somewhat flat, and it looked unusually neat. "I want you to cast a spell on my hair to keep it in place."

At that Haggar burst out laughing. "You want me to what?"

"You heard me," he protested, and a whiny edge crept into his voice before it changed to pleading. "My mother's insisting that I can't wear my helmet, and I don't want to look like a robeast is growing out of my head. I'm not a vain guy, but I am a fleet commander! I have an image to protect!"

"All the magic in the world isn't going to make you look attractive, Cossack, helmet or not," the old witch retorted. "Besides, didn't you ever hear of hairspray?"

Cossack narrowed his eyes. "Unattractive or not, at least unlike some of us, I'm not so ugly that no one can argue it. As for the hairspray, I figured with all your potions, you gotta have something if your magic is strong enough to pass you off in an illusion as a good looking woman."

With a frown the old witch raised her staff and pointed it at his head. "I have some magic that will still movement for four hours give or take. It might make your head a bit heavy and it does run the risk of numbing your brain, but that probably won't affect you much, so why not?" She raised her staff and pointed it at his head. A light blue beam emanated from the enchanted wood and surrounded his head with a light glow that lasted for a moment.

He heard a strange hum in his ears as the magic worked, and he waited until Haggar lowered her staff before he reached up and gently patted his hair. A goofy smile broke out across his features when it took significant effort to budge the locks from where they had fallen. "Thanks, Haggar!" he exclaimed with a goofy grin. "You know, sometime you should nail Merla's braid with that stuff and make it stick out or up like a handle." He snickered at the mental image.

"Don't tempt me," Haggar replied dryly, just as she heard a frenzied knock and then saw two individuals that looked to her like members of Cossack's family spill in. One was a man that bore some resemblance to Cossack, except that he was noticeably taller and lankier and looked a few years younger. The other was a shorter and somewhat stocky gray-haired Doomish woman with facial features not all that dissimilar to the commander's.

"There you are," the man said, obviously relieved. "Mom's in a panic! She thinks you got cold feet and ran off."

"But I thought we might find you here, knowing how much time you spend in this place," the woman said with a wry smile.

Upon seeing his siblings Stryck and Sulestri, Cossack made a slight face and then actively cast a scowl at Sulestri for her remark. He still remembered the wager she and her husband Zalik had made about him and Haggar with the rest of his siblings, and he had to resist the urge to grab Haggar's staff and beat her over the head repeatedly with it. However, he supposed with a wedding in a short while he had better things to do. "Maybe you thought that because that's where I _told_ you I wanted to go," Cossack said grouchily.

Stryck just shrugged, and tugged at the side of his collar, which was on the tight side. "Come on, Cossack, you have to admit it seemed farfetched."

"Really," Sulestri pressed, and shook her head. "Like we're supposed to believe that you wanted to leave to have a magic spell cast on your hair? I told you that you could use some of my gel if it bugged you that badly."

"First of all," Cossack addressed his sister, holding up his hand, "You did not inherit Mom's hair. That hair looks fine on you ladies, and girly boys like Stryck," he said, pointing to his brother's poufy mane that while well-brushed, tumbled and curled in all directions around his face and collar, "But on a fleet commander who's supposed to look all dressed up in fancy-schmancy crap on his wedding day and not allowed to wear his shiny clean helmet against his direct wishes, it's not a pretty sight."

"There's nothing pretty about you," Stryck snorted, much to the observing Haggar's amusement and mild vindication. "_I_ got the looks in the family."

Ignoring his brother, while Sulestri made a remark under her breath clearly challenging Stryck's self appointed title as the good looking child of Aldar'ach, Cossack pressed on with his original point. "Secondly, sis, real Doom men do not use," he made a face and said in a mock prissy tone, "hair gel."

At that Sulestri rolled her eyes. "Oh please. Take a peek in Prince Lotor's bathroom sometime and I bet you'll find every hair care product in the system and some imports to boot."

Eyeing Cossack's firm hairdo with a touch of envy, Stryck turned to Haggar. "So did you really zap his hair?"

The old witch nodded to the commander's younger brother. "Yes, and fortunately it's clear that what he has of a brain was unharmed."

Stryck flashed her a charming smile. "Would you mind nailing me, too?"

"Don't make Cossack jealous," Sulestri chortled, elbowing her younger brother in the side, while Cossack shot glares at both Haggar and his siblings and roughly grabbed Stryck's arm.

"No. The condemned man gets a last wish, and mine is that I be the only one of us that looks decent. You can go sit next to Tadran and sulk, you bastard." He looked over at his brother's formal wear, including the frilly manila collar around his neck. "By the way," he sneered in a false effeminate voice, "I love the collar." Stryck glowered in return and grumbled as his stronger brother hauled him through the door with Sulestri behind them, and Haggar following her, wondering once again what the Ancient Ones were thinking when they complicated her life with so many fools.

* * *

A short while later the big moment had finally come. Cossack paced in the hall of the grand temple on Castle Doom's grounds, knowing that within minutes or less he had to go up to the main doors of the chamber and walk in escorting Kuryaki to the altar where the cleric—a disciple of Cesteo, since Kuryaki had the higher station in the marriage—would officiate the ceremony. As was customary with first circle nobility marriages, especially any dealing with high seats, members of the ruling family were also present to witness and validate it as legal and binding.

Filling that role were King Zarkon himself and Queen Merla, and aside from the royals much of the on-planet nobility also attended, even individuals he otherwise could not stand. Some extended family of his own from off planet were present, but far fewer of Kuryaki's off-planet relations made it, including her daughter from Azuit and her son-in-law and grandchildren. She did add, however, that she was sure her son would be there in spirit for her. Cossack had the taste to leave it unsaid that he hoped otherwise, since the ugly artwork she had of him all over her manor was spirit enough without actually seeing his dog-faced ghost show up.

Before it was time to head out, Cossack's longtime fleet buddy Yaklitz walked in, grinning, and thumped him hard on the back. "You're in for it now. No turning back, no getting away."

"Thanks for reminding me," he snapped, and glanced at the door. "You know, if I wasn't sure my parents already had someone disable them, I'd be tempted to pull the alarms and make a break for it."

Yaklitz looked at him somewhat surprised. "You think they thought that far ahead?"

With a sigh, Cossack replied, "Yeah. Tried it once during an engagement party. If Mom ratted me out about Quackers, I'm sure she covered that too."

"Well then drink this, it'll steady you no problem," Yaklitz said, and handed him a flask.

Cossack obediently took a swig and then winced as the liquid—clearly some kind of very strong alcohol—burned his throat on the way down. "You want me to get married hammered?" he asked, and took another swig.

"Nope," Yaklitz replied with a shake of his head. "You're more obedient that way." He grinned. "Sorry, your Mom insisted."

Shaking his head and taking one last swig, he handed the flask back to his friend with a chuckle. "You suck… you sold me out to my mother just because you wanted to see me married and suffering like you?"

Yaklitz shook his head. "Don't be ridiculous! I sold you out because your mother threatened to tell my wife about the details of your bachelor party last night that your dumbass brother filled her in on if I didn't." He slipped the flask back into his pocket. "Nothing personal, man."

"You're lucky Quackers and I like you, Yaklitz, or else I'd kick your ass. Instead now I'll just have to kick Stryck's."

"In that case, stick a boot up his ass for me," the other man replied, and headed for the door. "See ya on the married side, Cossack!" he called out with a wave, and then departed down the hall to take his seat amongst the guests.

A quick glance at the timepiece told Cossack that the time had come for him to head out, so made his way into the hallway only to be stopped by his mother. Visycka was ecstatic, amazed that her marriage-resistant son had finally made it that far, but also frazzled. She looked his appearance over from head to toe and plucked the helmet off his head.

"I was gonna take it off," he insisted, and took it back out of her hands. He did not put it back on, however.

"Humor your mother," Visycka replied in a nagging tone as she surveyed his attire again. She frowned when her eyes fell on a bulge in his pocket. "What are you carrying?"

After a quick glance around to make sure no one was looking, he casually slipped the object out of his pocket. Visycka saw a brief flash of yellow and smiled when she realized it was not some weapon or item that would cause a ceremony-killing disruption, but the familiar duck-shaped form of Admiral Quackers. She watched Cossack set the duck in his helmet under a strap so it would not fall out. "For luck," he said, although in his opinion Quackers needed no justification.

Visycka smiled and patted his arm. "Of course." She then handed him a large jewelry box. "Here's the adornment. It's an arm guard that should go on the right arm."

"Sure," Cossack said with a nod, and then plunked it into the helmet as well before tucking it under his arm.

"Now give your mother a hug before you go off and get married, my Terrible Terror," she sniffled, and threw her arms around him dramatically.

Cossack made a face as a couple of guests arriving at the last minute passed by to go sit down, and glanced over at her emotional display and loud enunciation of his nickname. He gave his mother the obliging hug back and then released her. "Go on and have a wine or six and enjoy the show… because trust me, getting married is something you're only going to talk Cossack the Terrible into doing once."

Once his mother left, Cossack turned and walked up the hall on his way to the inevitable. Upon reaching the top of the staircase his yellow eyes widened and he smiled upon seeing his betrothed waiting for him. Kuryaki looked lovely—as all brides aspired to on such an important occasion—wearing an emerald and lilac colored sleeveless gown that reached high on her neck and fit her like a well-tailored glove hugging her figure and flowing gracefully onto the floor. Her hair had been styled a bit more dramatically than he had seen her in prior, and she wore a touch more makeup. Aside from the adornment from her first marriage she wore no jewelry—as was custom during a Doom marriage to allow the partner plenty of choices as to where to place the adornment—and she wore fine satin gloves dyed the exact shade of purple to match the hues in her dress upon her hands, which held a large box presumably holding the adornment she was to place on him.

Ever a bastion of tact and grace, Cossack ogled her dressed-up appearance simultaneously and shamelessly thinking both that she looked great and that he was looking forward to demonstrating it after the pomp of the ceremony when they were alone in the honeymoon suite. He let out an appreciative wolf-whistle. "You look hot," he informed her as he joined her side.

She smiled at him as he approached, taking his colorful assessment of her appearance in the spirit of a complement. "I'm glad you made it, and proved your youngest brother wrong," she told him wryly as she extended her arm for him to take so that they could walk to the altar in step. "He told me you were going to, and I quote, 'run away from the wedding like a scared little slave girl from the Pit of Skulls.'"

"Hmph, well, Tadran talks out of his ass a lot. That's one thing you'll learn about my family, that they don't know when to shut up," Cossack remarked as he took her arm.

Kuryaki let out a light laugh. "That explains quite a bit about you." When he flashed her a mildly indignant look she smiled back at him fondly. "By the way, you look quite smashing. I think the fleet uniform suits you much better than those collars."

At the praise Cossack smiled. "Thanks, that makes two of us."

"Two of us that look good, or two of us that think the collars look ridiculous on some of those that wear them?"

"Both," he answered, just as the doors were opened for the two of them to make their way in and walk through the temple up to the altar.

When they stepped through as a pair, Cossack could feel the eyes of everyone in the chamber on them. Although Cossack never had a problem with being the center of attention, it was difficult for him to ignore the various reactions he got from guests he passed as he and Kuryaki walked by them arm in arm. The first he overheard was his elderly great aunt making a remark to a cousin about Cossack needing to go from one mother to another to keep him in line, and he had to resist the urge to stop and stuff one of the decorative ornamental plants in the temple roughly into the old shrew's ugly hat. He grumbled under his breath, while Kuryaki either pretended she did not hear it or ignored it.

About halfway there he saw that one of his most loathed former superiors, the once-admiral-but-now-lowly-lieutenant Vardash, was also amongst the guests seated on the side of the bride's family. At that he could not help but make a remark, and whispered angrily to Kuryaki, "Who the hell invited Vardash to my wedding? And why did he come? He hates my guts as much as I hate his!"

"Your mother, I'm sure," Kuryaki murmured back, just low enough that only he could hear what she said. "High seat weddings require that at the minimum the high seats of the other houses and all of their children be invited. Vardash is a son of the high seats of Lorkim'orx. As for why he came, most likely because it would've been considered insulting to the nobility to refuse such an invitation, and he was always rather pleasant to me whenever I met him. Or it could be the free food and drinks," she added as an afterthought.

They were just about at the altar when she finished speaking, and Cossack caught sight of his siblings and parents sitting toward the front. Tadran sneered at him, but upon seeing the pale blue frilly collar around the boy's neck he felt that the insult had already been repaid in spades. The garment was uglier and girlier than any he recalled being forced to wear, and he took in the sight with smug satisfaction. As they came to a stop at the altar he took a last glance at his parents. His mother beamed and squeezed his father's arm in her exuberance, while Tadack gave him a not-so-subtle thumbs-up and a nod.

The cleric officiating the ceremony began to speak, and Cossack immediately stood up straight and attentively with his eyes on Kuryaki. This is it, he realized with mild alarm, but despite his panicky and anxious thoughts he stayed put and plastered a nervous smile on his face. He was Cossack the Terrible. If Voltron had not killed him, and royal temper tantrums had not killed him, surely marriage would not be anything he could not handle, right?

"Esteemed nobility of planet Doom, loyal subjects to his most honored highness King Zarkon and his Queen Merla," the priest spoke to the assemblage, "You are all gathered here today to witness the marriage of Lady Kuryaki, high seat of house Tonorm'oith and third daughter of Morrex and Iskeli, relations to Ermov'diast, to Fleet Commander Cossack, first son of Aldar'ach and high seats Tadack and Visycka. With this union sanctioned by our honored gods and liege the high seating of house Tonorm'oith shall forth be shared by the two to be joined here today until the end of their days upon the mortal plane."

The priest shifted his gaze to the couple before him, his eyes falling upon Cossack in mild criticism. His mystic abilities granted to him through worship had heightened his senses enough that he could tell that Cossack had been touched by favor of gods or spirits outside of Doom's pantheon, but it was not a vibration that was in conflict so he made no acknowledgment of it as he addressed him even if he did disapprove. "First son of Aldar'ach, do you accept and embrace the woman beside you as your bride, in accordance with all of the laws of the kingdom, empire, and the wisdom of our gods; swear your life and loyalty to her and the house in the name of the gods and before all these witnesses as testimony to your intent?"

_Wow, that's a lot of weasely wording_, Cossack thought as he listened to the cleric until the time came for him to give the appropriate response. Although he had the brief impulse to give a wise-assed remark or turn and run like the temple was on fire, instead all he did was nod and say, "Yeah."

Caught somewhat off guard by the groom's informality, but not enough to question or alter the ceremony, the cleric's eyes lingered on Cossack for a brief moment before turning to Kuryaki. "Lady Kuryaki, high seat of Tonorm'oith, do you accept and embrace this man beside you as your husband and grant him the title and privilege of sharing your house's station, in accordance with all laws of the kingdom, empire, and the glorious wisdom of our deities; swearing your loyalty and life to this man in their name and before all these witnesses?"

In the split second of pause between when the priest finished speaking and before Kuryaki could answer, Cossack wondered in a flash if she would say no or remember the obnoxious things that he had said or done and leave him standing there. Fortunately the commander's projection was an unnecessary concern or unrealistic fantasy—whichever one chose to call it—and Kuryaki's response was as proper as her title. "I do," she stated firmly, and smiled back at Cossack.

"Commander Cossack, you may now present your adornment to your bride."

"Oh yeah, this thing," Cossack muttered, and pulled the box out of his helmet. Quackers squeaked subtly as it brushed against the plastic, but if the priest heard it he made it a point to ignore it. Kuryaki however did hear it, and struggled for a brief moment to maintain her suitably snooty façade. Cossack tucked the helmet back under his arm and flipped open the box, revealing a platinum arm guard. The piece was a lovely open bracelet designed to look like a grape vine that wound around the arm twice before ending on one end with an intricately detailed grape leaf and on the other, a bushel of grapes. Cossack figured that his mother likely picked it out most likely as a symbol of their house and its contribution to it, but the design was tasteful enough that it seemed to suit Kuryaki well and it reminded him of booze, so that worked fine for him as a pretty trinket to represent their union. Kuryaki seemed a bit relieved and smiled approvingly when she saw the item, and Cossack wondered if his sister had said something to scare her about it beforehand. If so, he was going to have to get even with her, he decided. Perhaps he'd tell their mother that she really did have a crush on Vardash. No, not Vardash, that was too cruel even for Cossack the Terrible. Maybe Yaklitz's nerdy brother-in-law. Yeah. That would work.

The priest's eyes narrowed in a mildly stern expression at Cossack's nonchalance and snapped him out of his thoughts. "Yes, that," he said, and then held his hand over it. He murmured a prayer in the gods' tongue, an archaic language to them, to bless the adornment and then drew back. "Adorn your bride as yours as she will shortly claim you."

Cossack nodded obediently and took the arm guard with his free hand and slid it up her right arm, already extended to make it easy once she saw what it was. He carefully pushed the arm guard into place and smiled at her. "Last chance to run," he murmured under his breath as he secured it so that it would stay put.

"Can't run in these heels," she whispered back with a smile, and straightened as they resumed their positions.

"Hmm, thought you looked a little taller," Cossack quipped, watching as she then withdrew her box at the order of the cleric. He peered over as she opened it for his blessing and saw that it was a sturdy titanium bracer to be worn from the wrist to a third of the way up to his elbow. The design was simple yet tasteful, lightweight, durable, and to his relief not at all effeminate or anything that would get in the way of his regular military gear. When the priest finished saying his invocation over the adornment and ordered Kuryaki to adorn and claim him—wording that chafed at him slightly even if he did understand that was what the whole marriage deal involved—he dumbly held out his wrist for her to secure the arm guard.

Her nimble fingers slipped and clicked it into place in no time at all, and before he knew what was happening she entwined her fingers with his and turned to face the cleric. He followed suit, remembering vaguely from the weddings he had attended—the ones he stayed awake and paid attention to the ceremony of—that it was what he was supposed to do at that point.

"By the grace of our illustrious gods and the authority granted to me by our most honored rulers who preside as witness over this union," the cleric said with a nod to Zarkon and Merla, "I declare you to be joined as husband and wife and the recognized high seats of noble house Tonorm'oith." He bowed slightly before them. "You may now seal your arrangement with a kiss of affection, if you so desire," he added stiffly.

Cossack grinned at Kuryaki. "Sure." With surprising energy he let go of her hand so that he could draw his free arm around her and hold her close. He pressed his lips to hers and kissed her with enough ardor to let her know he was looking forward to the honeymoon, as in his opinion the kiss was the best part of the whole ceremony. He was pleased to feel the same measure of affection in her response, and it encouraged him to make the rather risqué move of slipping his tongue into her mouth. His thoughts were that not only would it be fun and possibly excite her, but it would tweak the stuffy high seats in attendance to no end if they noticed. Unfortunately he found his efforts thwarted by a firmly closed jaw and a wall of delicate teeth that would not budge to allow him passage. Regretfully the kiss then ended and they pulled apart to face the guests and bow to them in thanks as was customary once a marriage ceremony was completed.

The cleric waved for the guests to begin the customary greeting of the couple—a formality that, with a wedding of that size and prominence, would take some time—and left them to see to that while he retired to his chambers in the temple. As the crowd gathered around them, Cossack whispered to Kuryaki, "So, was my breath that bad?"

"Not your breath, dear, only your timing," she murmured back to him. "Fortunately in the short time we've known one another I had an idea of what to expect."

Cossack stole a glance at her. "You liked it the other night."

"We were alone the other night, not being witnessed by the nobility, our families, the royalty, and a cleric for the gods' sake."

"I'm sure at least a few of them wouldn't have been offended…"

Kuryaki snickered knowingly. "Dear as I'm sure your father is to you, you must know that he hardly sets the standard on what constitutes appropriate public behavior."

"Yeah, I've been told I'm a lot like him," Cossack countered with a wry grin.

The first guests to approach them were, as tradition demanded, King Zarkon and Queen Merla. Zarkon was the first to address the pair. "Congratulations, Cossack! I must say I'm surprised you found someone that would put up with you. Unlike your dear wife here, as my fleet commander I can just kick you out when you get on my nerves. She can only kick you as far as the couch." The tall king turned toward Kuryaki with a smirk. "Best of luck to you. I'm sure with Cossack you'll have your hands full."

"Not to mention your mouth," Merla added wryly. When Kuryaki's eyes went wide at the impropriety such a statement implied, she added, "Cossack excels at putting his feet in his, after all," she amended just in time to keep things tasteful.

Cossack smiled back at the snooty queen with equal insincerity as her saccharine tone implied. "At least no one can say they don't know where they stand with me."

"True enough," the pink-haired queen conceded. "Anyway, best wishes." With that, Merla and Zarkon nodded to them and made their way out to make room for more guests.

Cossack glanced at the long line of guests and made a slight face as he realized how long it would take to get through speaking with all of them. "We're gonna be here all day," he complained under his breath.

"Just smile and nod and it'll go faster," Kuryaki advised him as the king and queen left and Haggar stepped up next.

"I'd rather get onto the honeymoon," Cossack grumbled just before the witch was in earshot.

"And here you are, Cossack. I'm so proud of you for not running away and embarrassing your family and all of Doom this time." She smiled and looked to Kuryaki. "I can't say I'm envious of your position having to put up with him, but you'll be good for him. You've already improved his table manners remarkably. Maybe next we can get him to learn to knock before entering." She patted Cossack on the head. "Hmm, it's still holding! Not bad!"

"Your spell?" Cossack said with a slight grumble in his tone after being needled by the old witch.

Her smile spread to bare her fangs. "Nope, your brains! No helmet, but they're still in there! See, you can take it off once in a while!" She cackled.

"Yeah, and unlike some of us, I even look good with the less I wear," he retorted with a pointed look at the old crone in front of him. He turned and grinned at Kuryaki. "Isn't that right, baby?"

From where he sat in Haggar's arms, Coba let out a "mrow" that sounded dubious at best. Cackling again, Haggar scratched her pet behind the ears. "Enjoy the rest of your wedding, Cossack. I think I'm going to go work on a new robeast. A witch of my age can only socialize for so long, you know." She nodded to Kuryaki. "Good luck with him. Oh," she added with a gleam in her eye that only Cossack truly noticed, knowing her as well as he did, "my otherworldly powers show me that your son is here to witness this, and he's absolutely beyond words to express how he feels." She let out another light cackle as Kuryaki smiled fondly, touched that Zarkon's old witch was generous enough to pass on a sentimental message from beyond, while Cossack simply made a face. "Have a nice honeymoon, you two!" she finished, and departed in the same direction as the royalty.

"Zarkon's old witch isn't half as bad as the nobility makes her out to be at times," Kuryaki mused thoughtfully to Cossack as she walked off. "She's really quite personable in her quirky way."

"Yeah, she's a personality all right." Cossack noticed that his family was next in line and approaching fast. "And speaking of which…"

Tadack and Visycka stepped up to them with his sisters, brothers, and brother-in-law trailing behind. Cossack's mother threw her arms around her eldest son and squeezed him in a big bear hug while Tadack smiled fondly at the pair of them.

"It's finally done, my baby terror is all grown up and married!" Visycka exclaimed happily.

His siblings collectively chortled, and Stryck remarked much to the amusement of the rest of them, "Well, you got one out of two right."

Cossack shot his brother a dirty look. "Yup Mom, now that you've got two of us married off, you only have three to go. I'm sure you can find a nice robeast of a woman for Stryck, or maybe you could just give Vardash his number. Like you told Cassri, he is single."

Stryck's amused look faded into a glare at his older brother, while Tadack put an arm around Kuryaki's shoulders. "Welcome to the family. You know that you and any of your kin are welcome at our place anytime." He gave her an appreciative look, although not overt enough to be rude, and then he turned from his new daughter-in-law to his son. "You treat her well, and give us a grandkid sometime soon. Not that with a lovely lady like her that should be any problem."

Kuryaki shifted slightly where she stood, and paled slightly at the brashness of Tadack's words, although she was not entirely surprised by them. Cossack meanwhile inwardly groaned that they were already getting the kid lecture and half hoped that his mother would intervene. Unfortunately he had no such luck. Instead all Visycka did was grab her husband's hand and squeeze it. "Let's not rush them, dear, even if it would fill my mother's heart with joy to see my oldest son give me a little grand-terror to spoil rotten, especially since I now have two married children and no grandchildren yet…"

"Mother, didn't Cossack just get married? Maybe you can let him get through the honeymoon first," Sulestri's irritated voice cut in from behind, and Cossack realized that she had probably heard the kid lecture as often as he had heard the marriage one. He might have been sympathetic, except that she was the one who bet that he was sleeping with Haggar, so instead he just felt a childish sense of satisfaction that she was being nagged. He decided that he would do his best to ensure that it continued, perhaps by reminding his mother of her every time she mentioned kids to him. Yes, that was more than fair.

"Ah, we got everything under control. See you at the reception and at the next high seat meeting, ok?" Cossack replied brusquely, hoping his parents would get the hint and move on.

"Thank you for the well wishes," Kuryaki added politely.

That time they took the hint, and Tadack and Visycka said their goodbyes and left with Sulestri following behind. On their way out Cossack was pleased to overhear his mother strongly hint to her about how she and Zalik should think about having little nobles to further the family. Zalik meanwhile lagged behind with a frown on his face, first directed at Sulestri and Visycka, and then at Cossack. "I'll get you for this. Believe me, you've only just begun to hear it."

"Just like I've only begun to pay you back, my dear brother-in-law."

Somewhat taken aback, Zalik asked, "What'd I ever do to you?"

Cossack held up two fingers. "Two words: Witch Haggar."

"But that was her idea!" he protested. "I already had to pay off Cassri, isn't that enough?"

"By the way, you still owe me ten credits in interest," Cassri piped up from behind.

"Shut up," Zalik snapped irritably in her direction, straightening to cast a glare of threat at her. Unfortunately for him it was not very imposing because Cassri was about an inch taller than Zalik without benefit of her heels, and his skinny build was far from threatening, so she only made a rude face back at him.

Meanwhile a cruel grin spread across Cossack's features as he answered his brother-in-law's question. "Sorry," he said, it quite obvious he was anything but. "They call me 'Cossack the Terrible' for a reason."

"Kuryaki, you look like a reasonable lady… can you help me out?"

She shook her head. "You must know how Cossack gets once he sets his mind on something."

Zalik sighed once more, lowered his head, and shuffled off in the direction his wife had gone. "I'm doomed. Doomed. And it's all my wife's fault."

"Spoken like a man who's been married a long time," Yaklitz quipped from his spot in the line as Zalik passed by, only to get sharply elbowed in the side by his own wife.

Cossack opened his mouth to shout out a response to his friend, but as he drew breath to do so he felt a sharp nudge in his own side courtesy of Kuryaki, forcing him to keep a semblance of propriety. The newlywed commander sighed in bemused resignation, and returned his attention to the long line of guests in front of them. It deepened when he saw it was several key members of the Lorkim'orx clan, including Vardash. They exchanged pleasantries with the high seats and the ones Cossack had no active loathing grudge against, but eventually it was Vardash's turn to offer his well wishes.

Not surprisingly, the chubby former admiral completely ignored Cossack at first, and instead focused on Kuryaki. "Congratulations on your marriage, Lady Kuryaki. I wish you all the happiness on Doom."

Aware only that Cossack did not like Vardash and vice versa on a general level without knowing all the specifics, Kuryaki simply accepted the statement graciously. Since Vardash had always been pleasant to her when they had met—usually when fleet business had brought him to her home or she had crossed paths with him when he was with Yurak—she was indifferent to the grudge and considered whatever issues he had with Cossack between them. Cossack meanwhile glared at Vardash on principle, and reinforced it when he turned to him.

The glare was mutual, and the bald Doomite's face strained into an obviously forced semblance of politeness as he addressed him through his complete and utter loathing of Cossack. "Cossack…"

"That's Lord Cossack now, actually," he pointed out with a superior, proud tone, as he straightened. He did not really care much about the high seat title, but since he knew throwing status up in Vardash's face would piss him off, he did so shamelessly.

It worked like a charm. The edges of Vardash's lips twitched desperately to change his forced sneering smile into an active scowl. "Lord Cossack," he amended, an audible dose of irritation in his voice, "Treat her well. She deserves nothing but the best." He quickly smiled at Kuryaki again, and left before making nice with Cossack would make him retch.

Cossack meanwhile frowned, for he hated to agree with Vardash on anything but he could not exactly make a snappy retort to what he had said to him without it coming out in a way that would offend Kuryaki, and now that they were already hitched that would be rather counterproductive. "Maybe the admiral had the right idea after all," he grumbled under his breath as the next set of guests approached.

Kuryaki raised an eyebrow at him. "Don't let Quackette hear you say that."

"Well she didn't have to stand on this line and schmooze," Cossack pointed out. "If she did, she might agree."

Casually Kuryaki shifted her handbag so that she clutched it, and gave it a gentle squeeze. A very subtle squeak, soft enough so that only Cossack could hear, came from it as the guests next in line to greet them ascended the stairs. Immediately Cossack looked at her in wide-eyed shock. "You have Quackette?"

"As surely as you have a rubber waterfowl in your helmet," she confirmed.

"Wow." He was genuinely surprised that she had brought a toy along simply to humor him. "I knew you got her for the house, but I thought—"

Kuryaki smiled knowingly. "Given what your mother told me about your allergy to marriage, I figured it wouldn't hurt to bring along a little insurance against any last-minute jitters. I couldn't have you calling it off on the grounds that Quackers was stood up at the altar after all."

He could not help but chuckle at the thought. "Oh, that would've been a good one! I almost wish I'd thought of it."

"Almost?"

"Yeah," he said, and smiled back at her with a renewed sense of contentment. "Almost."

"So what do you think now?" she murmured quietly, casting her polite smile at the approaching guests.

"I think," he whispered back with a sly grin, "That all things considered, I'd much rather leave our plastic counterparts here to meet the guests and head on out to enjoy our honeymoon."

With a giggle so light that Cossack would have thought he just imagined it if he had not seen Kuryaki let it out, she replied in an equally soft whisper, "You know what, Cossack? I agree."

**The End**


End file.
